Boobs

“Dude, I have the smallest boobs, there’s almost nothing to actually put in my bra,” I said to my friend Mira the other day, when we were admiring someone’s juicy, ample cleavage on Instagram.

“Sameeeeee!” Mira said laughing.

So this week Mira and I are talking about boobs, tits, breasts, jugs, boobies, the bosom.

We both have itty bitty titties. And honestly, at this point (we’re both in our mid thirties) we finally feel so comfortable in our skin, we wouldn’t have it any other way.

But, that doesn’t mean we don’t think about other people’s boobs, look at other people’s boobs and sometimes want to touch other people’s boobs. 🤭

Apparently a lot of ya’ll feel the same way. There’s just something very appealing about…boobs.

Of all my posts on instagram, whether carousels or reels, the ones about boobs are often the most popular. Sometimes I think of this as sort of silly. There are so many more interesting things re: sex that we could be talking and learning about. But other times I see the appeal. Boobies are the shit.

A few weeks ago I shared a reel with some of you on my broadcast channel where a woman reveals that she loves looking at other women’s breasts, not in a sexual way, but in a curious way. She tells us about a woman that caught her staring at her huge boobs at a party, smiled and asked if she’d like to touch them.

“Omg I remember that reel!” Mira says. “I wish I was at that party! And btw I am so intrigued by fake boobs too - like what do they feel like, has the technology advanced? I so relate to having the thought of ‘can I touch them?’ (only with consent of course!)”

I mean, who can deny the allure of a pair of plump, juicy, bouncy boobies 🥹

Breasts sit at the heart of so many visual cultures, from temple sculptures to Renaissance nudes to Instagram selfies. Even people who aren’t sexually attracted to women often find breasts visually compelling. There’s something almost archetypal about them: soft, curved, symmetrical, nurturing, sensual. They’re a potent blend of comfort and eroticism, safety and seduction. Breasts are both life-giving (they feed us as infants) and life-affirming (they signal vitality, fertility, pleasure). Both sacred and taboo.

I also talked to Sheila, a friend of mine who has size 34D boobs. Interestingly, she thinks she falls into the “mid” category and doesn’t consider her breasts particularly large. I laugh, looking at them and raising my eyebrows.

“34 of my boobs wouldn’t fit into your bra.” I say as she laughs.

“Ok, ok they are quite big, but not so big that they obstruct my life or fitness routine or work.” (She has a very active job).

“I really love my boobs. Like really really. I get jealous of the men I’m intimate with because I don’t have anything as awesome to touch in return. I often find myself with my hands on my boobs thinking, ‘lucky me’,” she said wistfully.

I agree.

“I did think of one downside to my boob size though,” says Sheila. “There are some cute tops and outfits I just couldn’t ever wear. Not because they’re too revealing but because my boobs just won’t fit into certain types of clothing and it just ends up looking silly.”

I smile thinking about the numerous pretty dresses I’ve tried on only to see the top half hanging off my flat chest.

The grass is perhaps always greener.

Indian society is full of juxtapositions and boobs are no exception. We love the wet sari scenes but we also want to uphold modesty as a value - especially for women. Women are asked to cover their chests, practice modesty and hide away this part of their bodies. And yet we also want them to appear quite regularly during an “item” song. Perhaps one of the most famous ones even having many double entendres in its lyrics, Choli Ke Peeche Kya Hai.

Even though my boobs are so small, I’ve reached for a dupatta or even used my long hair to cover the barely there form of my breasts even though already fully clothed, when having to be in a crowded place or interact with an unexpected visitor because it feels like that is the expected decorum. I’ve also posed to make sure my titties look cute in my bikini when taking photos on the beach with my friends.

Breasts are celebrated, censored, commodified. But the appeal for me is also reclamation: looking at breasts without the filter of the male gaze, and seeing them as beautiful because they are ours.

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