Leadership Lessons from Malala

I recently had to drive down to Raleigh NC for an important meeting - 5 hours each way, ugh! - so I spent the time listening to the audiobook of Malala Yousafzai’s new memoir “Finding My Way” narrated by the author.

As you probably know, Malala was shot in the head by the Taliban at 15 years old for speaking out about the rights of girls to be educated in her native Pakistan. After she was shot, she was evacuated to a hospital in England, where her family was relocated to avoid continued threats.

By the time she was released from the hospital, her story had gone viral worldwide, and her father had set up the Malala Foundation to raise money to advocate for girls education. Her life completely changed. One day she was a student who had never left her rural province in Pakistan, and the next she was an international sensation, flying around the globe to speak with world leaders. Two years later she was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize for her advocacy work.

The book mostly tells the story of her struggles during and immediately after her school years - trying to make friends at her elite private high school in Birmingham, England, then going to Oxford for college and juggling her obligations to her foundation (which paid her tuition as well as living expenses for her entire family) while also trying to have a social life and live like a normal college student. Not to mention the security concerns, ongoing health issues and lingering PTSD from the attack, and having to deal with internet trolls and uproar from people in Pakistan any time a picture was posted on social media of her wearing jeans or doing something else her conservative parents were sure would cause shame to the family.

While not a leadership book per se, the stories within the book illustrate important leadership principles:

1. Know Your Priorities. Malala’s top priority was to make the most of her college experience, but the foundation was constantly booking her to give speeches around the world, and when she was home on breaks, her father filled up her schedule with social events. After her first year of Oxford, she barely passed her exams. So she had her academic advisor write a letter forbidding her from traveling during the school term and saying that if she didn’t make time to study during breaks that she would fail out of school. She used the letter to convince the foundation to only schedule speeches and events during the summers, and to persuade her father to give her time to study when she was home.

2. Stand Your Ground. In a wide-ranging interview with British Vogue magazine, Malala stated that she didn’t understand why getting married was so important, and she wasn’t sure she was ever going to do so. This was not the topic of the interview, it was a side comment she made during her conversation with the reporter, but trolls in Pakistan immediately made it into a huge scandal, claiming that she was denigrating traditional values and trying to destroy Pakistani society. Her parents, who were obsessed with public opinion and terrified of controversy, pleaded with her to recant the statement, but she refused. She stated that she would not, because every time she said anything in the future, she was opening herself up to having to change that message if someone criticized it.

3. Live in Integrity with Your Values. A couple years after the above controversy, Malala decided that she did want to marry Asser, who she had been dating for a few years - secretly, since arranged marriages was the custom in her culture. But she told him up front that she was not willing to give up her autonomy for a traditional marriage, which meant that she was not willing to take his last name, did not want to have children, and was committed to continuing her advocacy work on behalf of girls education, and if he was not in agreement about any of those issues, she would not marry him. He agreed, and they got married in 2021. And instead of asking her to change her life for him, he quit his job with the Pakistani national cricket team and moved to England. They recently co-founded a financial capital firm that invests in women’s sports leagues and teams, to advance gender equality in the sports industry.

If you’re looking for a fascinating and inspirational book for the upcoming holiday season, pick up “Finding My Way.” And I highly recommend listening to the audiobook. Hearing Malala’s story in her own voice is very powerful, and like me, will leave you with fierce admiration for her resilience, courage, and ambition.

And if you read it, please let me know what you think. Comment here or shoot me an email at molly@vellamo-leadership.com.