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marcusding’s blog

May you be happy, friend.

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Open Sesame - I Now Have to Ask My Internet Router to Give Me Internet

I have a problem. It’s 11 PM, I tell myself “just five more minutes of Reddit” and suddenly it’s 2 AM and I hate myself. Sound familiar? After years of failing to fix this with willpower alone (spoiler: willpower doesn’t work against billion-dollar engagement algorithms), I decided to solve it the only way I know how: by overengineering the hell out of it. The result? My router now interrogates me…

Heater Spiral

Self-designed PCB pendant that uses a MOSFET-driven heater spiral for embodied awareness practices.

Doyle Spiral Studio

Animating Doyle spiral circle packings and translating them into etched steel and wood artworks.

findmyfl.at

findmyflat is a web service that continuously scans all public housing providers in Berlin and instantly notifies you via Telegram about new apartment offers.

When Your Meditation Teacher Becomes the Lesson

After two months on a silent retreat in the California mountains, I left two weeks early – not because of what I discovered about my mind, but because of what I discovered about my teacher. I’m writing this for anyone considering intensive practice with a teacher, and for anyone who has felt confused by dynamics with somebody in a position of authority they couldn’t name. The Setup A two-month…

What Two Months of Intensive Practice Taught Me About Emotions, Self, and the Body

After previous retreats gave me a taste of the joy, love, and freedom that practice can bring, I wanted to see what would happen with sustained intensive practice. I spent two months on retreat in the California mountains, practicing six to ten hours daily. What I expected: deeper jhana access, maybe some insight stages, perhaps a taste of awakening. What I got: a fundamentally different…

anattā – 𑀅𑀦𑀢𑁆𑀢𑀸

Anattā is an interactive mirror experiment highlighting impermanence of identity.

What I learned about meditation, love, and trauma on and after a TWIM retreat with Delson Armstrong

I have been practicing tranquil wisdom insight meditation (TWIM), a powerful loving-kindness-based meditation system, for the past six months with a special focus on forgiveness practice. Through that, I already discovered that I and my friends often use shame and guilt to try to control each other. After becoming aware of that I dropped a lot of these patterns. When I started on my meditative…

Curium

The Curium project was designed around the development of 12U CubeSats, using components primarily sourced from commercial manufacturers.

My First Five-Day Silent Retreat: Jhanas & Alexander Technique

Last week, I went on my first silent retreat at Gaia House in Britain. I was drawn to the place by the charm and resonance of Rob Burbea’s teachings, which I listened to on dharmaseed.org. He was a resident teacher at Gaia House, and the retreat I attended was led by Catherine McGee and Yahel Avigur, both of whom were strongly influenced by his teachings. The retreat was a challenging but still…