M was born in June. Our first kid. They’re still just a little grub, squirming and wriggling around. But I daydream about the future—when they are a real person, walking around on their own, talking to us—and imagine new traditions we might practice as a family.
Granted my memory is horrible, but when I think back on my own childhood—a very family-oriented one at that—I don’t remember having many remarkable traditions. We usually ate dinner together, washing our hands and helping set the table before sitting down. On St. Patrick’s Day we always seemed to have corned beef and cabbage (and soda bread). On mornings before I had a big standardized test at school, my mom would make crepes for breakfast.
Now between my tendency to procrastinate and the frenzy of raising a child, if I’m not intentional about establishing traditions then there’s a good chance time will just slip away.
What follows is a list of tradition-like things I’ve found and would really like to emulate with M.
Christmas cards (via C. W. Moss)
Since I was a toddler, I’ve made the artwork for my family’s Christmas card. It’s mailed to friends, family, and enemies.
Birthday interview questions (via Jamie Thinglestad)
Each year on their birthdays I interview our kids and ask them the same set of questions. These videos are a great reference to what they thought each year they were growing up.
- How old are you going to be?
- What is your favorite color?
- How tall are you?
- What is your favorite food?
- Who are some of your best friends?
- What is your favorite show?
- What is your favorite thing to do?
- What is the best part of your day?
- Where would you like to go for vacation?
- What do you want to do when you grow up?
- What is your favorite movie?
- What is your favorite animal?
- If you could be an animal, what would it be?
- How would you describe yourself?
- What is your favorite kind of weather?
- What is your favorite book?
- What do you want to do this year?
- What was your favorite thing you did last year?
- What is your biggest goal in life?
- How do you like being a big sister?
- How much is your allowance?
- What is your favorite sport?
- Tell a story about something
- Who is your favorite teacher and why? (Start asking in middle school)
Pizza night (via Austin Kleon)
In the beginning, there was pizza, but no movies. My youngest son would get too sad or scared or upset to sit through a feature film. “One day,” I thought, “One day we will be able to all sit down and eat pizza and watch a real movie together.”
The Common Sense Media website helped a lot: we could review the plot lines and fill the young one in on what was going to happen and assure him that everything would turn out okay.
Amusement parks on Father’s Day (via Paul D.)
If you are a father of young kids, go to your local amusement park on Father’s Day. Skip the sleeping in or the golf or the hike or whatever you would really like to do, and enjoy a place the kids will love and you probably will too because it will be virtually empty. On top of that, you’ll be a hero.
The question book (via Seth Godin)
When your kid turns 12, give them a blank notebook. “Any time you have a question that’s embarrassing or you’re not sure who to ask, just write it down in this notebook and put it on my bed. I’ll write out an answer and return it the next day.”
By taking off some of the interpersonal pressure, this creates a useful channel for questions and answers.
That’s what I have so far. I’ll keep this list updated when I find or try other things.
What family traditions do you keep?
Some other ideas:
- Sending postcards to friends and family on their birthdays or when we travel or when we’re thinking of them
- Taking pictures in the same spot or from the same angle consistently over a long period of time
- Tracking their height with marks on the wall, starting when they can stand on their own
- Get an email address and send them messages and pictures as like a time capsule for when they’re old enough to have email
This post is part of the IndieWeb carnival for August 2024 hosted by Steve Ledlow on the topic of rituals.
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