The Dating Apps Work. You’re Using Them Wrong.

Every friend of mine who is getting divorced has asked me the same question, usually at the end of dinner, usually after the second drink, with the phone already out. How do I do this. They mean the apps. They got married before the apps and they have spent fifteen years watching the rest of us be miserable on them from across the table, and now they’ve downloaded one and they’re holding it like a grenade.

I tell them the same thing every time. The apps work. You are about to use them wrong. You are going to upload the photos everyone uploads and write the bio everyone writes and swipe on strangers for a month and then tell me the apps don’t work. They work. You just have to do the opposite of what the app wants you to do.

There are three rules. The first one sounds insane until you try it.