The Manifestation Mistake That Almost Cost Me My Marriage, My Business, and My Mind

How do you know if what you’re manifesting right now is what you actually want?

That, my love, is the million dollar question.

That I would argue… could make you a million dollars. Or… cost you a million dollars.

Depending on whether or not you’re manifesting them for the right reasons, will determine the result that you’re going to get in the end.

And my god did I learn some big lessons around this. Which led me to a framework that I’m about to blow your mind with so that you don’t repeat the same mistakes that I did.

If you didn’t already know this about me, I’m a pattern recognition girly. It’s one of the nerdy things about me. You know those “one of these things is not like the other” IQ tests where you’re shown like 4 pictures that all look the exact same but there’s a subtle difference in one of them that you’re supposed to find?

Oh I will find that difference.

I like to use my insane pattern recognition abilities to my advantage in studying human behavior and the Universal Laws. The power combo that has made me $35M in my career and counting. Nerds rejoice! The shit you got bullied for as a kid? It’s actually your wealth superpower.

While my husband would argue that I watch reality TV to entertain myself after a long day of writing, seeing clients, trying to hack the Instagram algorithm, feeding kids, and wiping butts, I prefer to call it human psychology hour. Ya know, “for research purposes.” That yes, is also ridiculously entertaining. I’m a sucker for reality TV. (Current fave? Million Dollar Nannies on Hulu)

I’ve been in the realm of manifestation, studying the Universal Laws of the Quantum Field since I was 16 years old when I first became conscious of the word “manifestation.” I have also been teaching people how to manifest in the online space since I was 21 years old when I started my first business in a fitness MLM, before I started Manifestation Babe at 23 years old. I’m 33 now, btw.

So when 2025 turned out to be one of the most chaotic years of my entire adult life, you know I had to find out why.

The strangest part about it was the fact that it was the year I manifested something that I’ve always wanted.

Or…. at least I thought I did.

One night in late 2025, after feeling exceedingly frustrated for the 6th month in a row, I went digging into my reality to identify the subconscious patterns at play. Since we now live in the age of AI, I invited good ol’ Claude to join this brainstorm sesh with me.

Claude helps me fine tune my pattern recognition skills especially when I’m way too embarrassed to share the details with another human. I also know I have blind spots, and need the most neutral third party I can find to call me the fuck out. Bonus points, I also trained him to coach me in the same way I coach my clients so that’s always a plus too.

We went back and forth until I hit a major lightbulb. That not only unfolded a potent framework that I could pass onto my students & clients… but also answer the questions that have never been answered with such pristine clarity I never had before.

I guess everything really does happen for a reason, right?

Because if it weren’t for my life blowing up, The Desire Audit would’ve never been born.

(Don’t worry, I’ll get into the juicy story of what blew up (and why) later down the post).

Why is it that some manifestations bring me immense joy when they manifest (and that joy stays with me for years after they’ve been fulfilled)?

While other desires leave me feeling empty, wondering “is this really it?!” Or worse, feeling hopeless and depressed?

Why do some desires create chaos? While others create peace?

Why do some desires come with a lot of resistance or take a really long time to manifest? While others either manifest seamlessly or don’t manifest at all?

And why do certain desires create certain emotions & energies in our lives once they’ve manifested? And how can we see this coming ahead of time?

Using the new framework I had just uncovered, I had to test it. I jotted down a few desires of mine that have manifested over the last few years differentiated by how they made me feel when I had manifested them.

And boyyyyy did the pattern recognition brain light the fuck up.

Because once I tell you the Desire Audit framework and how to find out which desire is which, you’ll never be able to unsee it again.

Here was my list (w/ a few additions I thought of as I wrote this post).

• the current home I live in (been here 3 years, still obsessed every day)

• my 22nd floor luxury apartment in LA (the views were insane)

• My audience that supports me on every platform I explore (thank you to my new Substack babes, I love you. It’s been such a joy to write to you)

• my husband (who I met on Tinder of all places)

• my children

• All the exotic trips that I ever went on to places that literally blew my mind (like Bora Bora & hanging out with mountain gorillas in Rwanda)

• my G-Wagon (loveddd that car)

• taking my entire family on an African Safari & flying them all in a private jet (highly, highly, highly recommend)

• making $3.6M in a single month for a program that I put my heart and soul into creating (this felt so different from the other launch in the next section)

• My unmedicated birth that I worked for TWO pregnancies to have (I don’t regret it at all but did I REALLY need to be that against pain meds? I mean… OUUUUCH. I did push out a sunny side up baby though….iykyk)

• My Audi R8 that I had on my vision board since I was 16 (I loved it at first but it quickly became my husband’s car because she’s a rough ride and I realized I don’t actually like driving supercars that much)

• My first multi 6-figure launch because I was more connected to the metrics than the people signing up and I was anxious the whole launch (I remember seeing $500k in my bank account and thinking… “so, now what?” Weird, I know)

• Getting my science degree in Cellular, Molecular, Developmental Biology and fulfilling so many pre-med pre-reqs that I had to take these classes for an additional year (clearly don’t use this degree lol)

• The plastic surgery I got in 2018 that left me marked and scarred and hiding my body even more (I share the whole story + how to avoid the knife with energetic plastic surgery here)

• My decision to be a stay-at-home mom when I thought that I was ready to retire from my business (we will talk about this one later)

  

As you can see, each of these desires made me feel a completely different emotion once they came true.

Enter the framework: Heart desires vs Head desires vs Wound desires.

You can also call these authentic desires vs conditioning desires vs compensation desires. I’m sure there are a lot of different labels we can give to these categories, but these names will give you the basic idea.

Basically, there are 3 voices.

Depending on which voice you listen to will manifest completely different energies in your life. Or, be the reason why the manifestation is taking a really long time. Or, manifest with a shitton of resistance. Or cause you to spiral into a depression because you thought the manifestation was going to make you feel a certain way (or avoid another feeling) and… it didn’t.

Here’s the shortest, simplest way to tell them apart.

And if you’re still unsure after I share the framework, I made you a 2-min quiz you can take to test each desire that automatically runs through my framework. You just enter your desire (don’t worry I don’t see this part in my backend if you want to keep it private), run through the 7 questions I ask, and you will get a result that either says Heart, Head, Compensation/Wound or Mixed depending on how you answered each of the questions.

There will also be an opportunity to purchase my full Desire Audit Process at the end of the quiz if you want to access my full framework and also know how to heal the wound underneath a wound desire and shift it into an authentic heart desire.

Highlyyyy recommend, but optional. Just letting you know it’s there.

Take the 2-min quiz here

Authentic heart desires = least resistance, fastest pathways, greatest feeling of joy + permanently stays in your life for as long as you want it. I’d say it’s pretty important to stick with the heart desires if you ask me.

Because I’m about to tell you what happens (at least the parts I can share for now, with more coming later as the lessons complete) if you follow the wound ones. And it ain’t pretty babes.

Upgrading to paid is where I share the realest of the real. Stuff you won’t find me talking about on any other platform. At least not this deep ;) With a simple upgrade, you’ll unlock:

• The felt difference between a heart, head, and wound desire so you know exactly how to tell them apart

• The rest of this story: The exact moment my marriage started to crack, what I actually did to pull it back, and how I found the heart desire buried under the wound that almost took me out

• Every paid deep dive I’ve written, unlocked the second you upgrade with the pieces I’m too honest to publish anywhere public

• The frameworks I’m building in real time, not the ones I’ve taught a thousand times, but the new edge I’m reaching for as I evolve.

• The unedited version of my life and business: the tea, the lessons still unfolding, and the behind-the-scenes I only trust the women in this room with