"How Do I Control My Mama Bear Instincts?"

Years ago, our family travelled out West to explore Big Sky, Montana, and Jackson Hole, Wyoming.

It was amazing to be in God’s creation, and I found myself in awe of these scenic masterpieces.

Of all the stories I heard that week, one that stands out was shared by our tour guide at Grand Teton National Park.

As we noticed some bears in the distance, he explained the nature of mama bears.

As we know, they’re fiercely protective. They spend the first 2 years of their cubs’ lives hiding them and secretly training them to handle the realities of bear life — a world where they aren’t safe from any other bears, including their own fathers.

You see, their fathers will kill them to mate with their mothers again. So the mothers take extra precaution while the cubs are young and unable to defend themselves.

You don’t mess Mama Bear, and most human deaths caused by a grizzly relate to a mother grizzly protecting her cubs.

As a mom and a parenting writer, I couldn’t help but laugh over the human translation. Motherhood makes us tender—yet it also makes us fierce. What comes out depends on the situation.

Living in the South, I see the tenderness of motherhood often. I’m surrounded by gracious women who exude warmth and hospitality. Good manners are valued in Southern culture, and you’ll meet a lot of Steel Magnolias who possess both grace and grit.

Yet what I also know is that even the kindest, most gentle, and most gracious women have a fierce protective instinct when it comes to their children. Like any good mom, they’d walk through fire to protect them.

Sometimes this instinct is needed. Evil is real, and I’ve seen mama bears have legitimate reasons to get upset and cause a stir.

The instinct to protect a child is good and necessary. It’s a gift from God to even notice real threats.

But as a reader of mine once asked:

“How do I control my mama bear instincts? How do I know when I’m justified—or when I may be overreacting?”

That is a great question, and one I’ll unpack below.