When Pride Leads and God Redirects

In his pride the wicked man does not seek him; in all his thoughts there is no room for God. – Psalm 10:4

My phone rang. I answered it as I usually do.

Me: “Hello, this is Juliann.”

Her: “Juliann, this is Diane.” (pseudonym name)

It was a new regional boss who had come on board to help “turn around” a women’s networking group in the technology space. I was acting as an executive director for a local chapter. It was during the early 2000s, after 9/11.

Me: “Oh hi, Diane, how are you? “

Now we had a couple of conversations prior to this one, but not many interactions.

“I am fine, thank you. “

Me: “I’m glad you called, I wanted to tell you about…”

Her: <interrupts me> Uh, excuse me Juliann, but I am going to lead the course of this conversation. Effective immediately, you are removed as executive director for the chapter of said organization. You may submit any last expenses related to events that you had, but any coming events you have planned will be cancelled. Please make all arrangements and notify any partners you are working with. “

What? I was sitting in my chair, just stunned.

I was just going to tell her that I signed a really great sponsor that would have helped with profitability before she cut me off. So, I dared to say, “Umm, I did just sign that sponsor we had discussed, would you like me to connect you to her?”

“No, we are moving in a different direction. Cancel the sponsorship. Is what I am saying to you clear?”

“Yes, it’s clear.”

“Ok, that will be it for today. Take care.”

Click.

Now to be fair, I forget all the specifics of this conversation, but it was short and to the point. What I remember most was “I’ll be directing the course of this conversation.” It was effective.

¹⁶ By their fruit you will recognize them. Do people pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? ¹⁷ Likewise, every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. – Matthew 16-17

This is not a victim story, quite the contrary. I deserved it. It wasn’t from a lack of capability or performance. Well, maybe some performance, I did struggle making events profitable as did most of the other chapters due to the business model. Beyond that, it was hefty volunteer job that took me away from other things, including time with God.

I was fired because I was not following along with their “new” plan. I had in my mind what needed to be done, and what would be successful. I had a few conversations with the new boss, but I was headstrong about my ideas and pushed against her recommendations on what to do next.

I was not reading the tea leaves, I was being bullish about “what I was going to do.”

I doubled down and didn’t heed any of the red flags that were flying.

I also was ignoring God’s promptings to step down prior to this point. He knew what was going to happen, this organization would eventually fold not long after.

Unbeknownst to me, I was wasting my time. I remained focused on making something work to my own detriment.

The reality was, this work was not bearing good fruit. It was a test on a couple of levels:

1. To see if I would obey Him when he told me to walk away.

2. To let me fall, and fall hard.

When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom – Proverbs 11:2

I was so embarrassed, I had to make all those calls to cancel events, let the other volunteers know what was happening, talk with the sponsor who was really excited about working together. All the unraveling.

Lessons Fully Revealed

I had not thought about this situation for many years. I had it packed away neatly, in a box of the past and thought I had learned what I needed at the time.

As I was preparing for this post, I was planning to write about something else. During prayer, this moment came flooding back into my mind. I felt the shame all over again, as emotionally charged memories do when they resurface.

God handed me the mirror to see myself and understand the full consequences of pride. Check.

God also showed me something else. His amazing Mercy.

God filled me with a healing Grace. I had not looked at this situation with the wisdom that I have now. It all made sense.

That situation had to happen the way it did. I needed to take a fall. It wasn’t the first fall or the last one, but it was a pivotal one.

It has almost come full circle, but there was one more thing.

A Warning

“You warned them in order to turn them back to your law, but they became arrogant and disobeyed your commands. They sinned against your ordinances, of which you said, ‘The person who obeys them will live by them.’ Stubbornly they turned their backs on you, became stiff-necked and refused to listen. - Nehemiah 9:29

I’ve recommitted myself to this blog and being a part of this Substack community. God is letting me know, so I don’t miss the message, that I could easily slip back into “doing it my way” versus following His lead. All the ego traps that come with writing and figuring out Substack are not far – I could start thinking that this is all me and not Him.

Let’s recap the lessons I learned so I can come back to this post in the future, should I find myself down the slippery slope again:

1. Obedience is the key to a fruitful relationship

“and observe what the Lord your God requires: Walk in obedience to him, and keep his decrees and commands, his laws and regulations, as written in the Law of Moses. Do this so that you may prosper in all you do and wherever you go – 1 Kings 2:3”

2. Pride hardens your heart so you cannot hear God.

Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall. - Proverbs 16:18

3. When everything feels like a struggle and your efforts bear no good fruit, pay attention—it may be God's sign to change course.

“The ax is already at the root of the trees, and every tree that does not produce good fruit will be cut down and thrown into the fire.” Matthew 3:10

4. There are consequences to ignoring God’s promptings.

Listen to my instruction and be wise;
do not disregard it.
Blessed are those who listen to me,
watching daily at my doors,
waiting at my doorway.
For those who find me find life
and receive favor from the Lord.
But those who fail to find me harm themselves;
all who hate me love death.” – Proverbs 33-36

5. Do not carelessly sacrifice time away from God for selfish pursuits. God is jealous.

Do not worship any other god, for the Lord, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God. – exodus 34:14

Final Thoughts

When we intentionally enter a closer relationship with God, we tend to think it’s going to be all rainbows and answered prayers. We have this idea that our changed behavior will earn us a spot in His good graces. But that’s not how it works.

As with all relationships, there is responsibility. God is no different. Scripture provides the map, but the most fruitful path is through prayer. Consistent, humble prayer opens the door to truly know Him—the way we’d invest time to know a new friend, a partner, or a neighbor who becomes dear to us.

The journey will bring surprises and outcomes that don’t look like blessings on the surface. There are consequences for our sins, intentional or not. And sometimes, the hardest lessons are the most necessary ones. When we find ourselves in precarious situations, we must pause and ask:

What is God trying to tell me or show me in this situation?

When it comes to God working in our lives, the surface rarely reveals what lies beneath. Like Scripture itself—the words say one thing, but the meaning runs far deeper. What looks like failure may be redirection. What feels like loss may be protection. What seems like discipline is often love.

This I know: God is good. He loves us completely. He is merciful beyond measure. And He makes all things—even our mistakes, even our falls—work together for our good.

For that, I am eternally grateful.

Thanks for reading.