Thinking with my fingers
No matter that I might want to write—or to have written—something profound or even moderately meaningful, I just cannot. There s nothing consequential clawing to be released from the confines of my brain. Instead, there s only emptiness in search of a Continue reading
Disjointed sleep patterns added a touch of interest to my life for a while. But the interest has evolved into something less appealing—more confusing and disturbing. When those patterns began to emerge, I found them somewhat curious and appealing, as Continue reading
Flavors of Indian and Indonesian food urge me to change who I am and where I go. They invite me to crawl through the soft dominions of time and distance, seeking communion with moments too powerful to ignore, but too Continue reading
Leaders of nations serve as role models. Many of those models should be preserved in a perpetual bath of formaldehyde and corrosive acid. The speeds of Earth s revolutions around the Sun feel dangerous. Worse than that—deadly, as if the slightest deviation Continue reading
This place is not suitable for a man who relies on weakness for balance. I can stay upright, I think, only if someone has lashed me to a mast. Or until I surrender and submit to external control. Perhaps I Continue reading
Yesterday afternoon, while sitting in our entertainment room watching Jeopardy with mi novia and mi cuñada, I was struck by the amazing scope of knowledge of the television participants and by the people sitting alongside me. How, I wondered, can the human Continue reading
REVISED: I ve lost track of time again; the majority of the last six days—more or less—exist only as fragmented memories that seem to rely on a blend of experience and the compensation my imagination provides. I m sure the recent radiation Continue reading
My original diagnosis of lung cancer, around Thanksgiving in 2018, did not correspond with a big increase in traffic to this blog. At the time, my blog had even fewer followers than it does today. Reading the posts, today, that Continue reading
The time has somehow slipped by, unnoticed. I ve already written most of today s post in just the last two hours. And I ve had my espresso and taken a few pills and otherwise paid homage to modern medicine. I am now ready Continue reading
The desire for solitude competes with the need for company or companionship. Fulfilling one has the effect of making the other unavailable or otherwise impossible to obtain. Those conflicting needs/wants make as much sense as wishing for the temperature to Continue reading