what leaving my job made me realize

I woke up this morning feeling the weight of being unemployed.

But it’s a feeling I was prepared for.

I’ve done enough work to understand my own mind and how quickly it can spiral if I let it. These feelings aren’t new to me anymore, and I trust myself enough to know they’ll pass.

It’s only been ten days since I arrived in Paris and just over two weeks since my last day at my corporate job.

Before leaving Miami, I had already started interviewing for roles in Berlin and across EMEA as a way to test the market and understand where I stood. I’m genuinely proud that I made it to final rounds. In one process, there was simply someone who was a stronger fit.

Of course, it would have been nice to receive an offer and remove some of the uncertainty that comes with this chapter. But deep down, I knew it wasn’t meant to be mine. A redirection, maybe.

Because if I’m being honest with myself, a part of me never wants to go back to corporate.

I value stability, and I value freedom. But for as long as I can remember, I’ve envisioned a life where I work for myself — where I partner with multiple companies at once, helping them think strategically, build meaningful products, and bring ideas into the world.

I’m writing this out loud because somehow every road seems to circle back to this.

This morning I got ready and walked myself to a café because cafés have always been my reset button. When I’m overwhelmed or feeling frazzled, I write, plan, organize, and map out possibilities. I need to turn uncertainty into options because it gives me a sense of order and knowing.

Funnily enough, a few of my close girlfriends are also navigating unemployment right now.

I’ve started to see this period less as being “between jobs” and more as a transitional season that life has unexpectedly given us — time to figure out what we actually want next instead of staying comfortable or immediately jumping into the next thing simply because that’s what we’re supposed to do.

At the end of the day, we’re healthy, capable, loved, and fortunate enough to have options. How we spend our time matters.

So we’re exploring, soul-searching, travelling, spending time alone, building things, meeting people, and saying yes to opportunities we might not have considered before. Perspective changes everything.

Uncertainty will come and go. I’m not worried about that part.

Even during interviews, I found myself saying the same thing over and over again: yes, I made this jump because I believe in myself.

And I do.

This morning I spent time sketching, journaling, and planning. I asked myself what kind of work I would love doing in five or ten years if corporate wasn’t the default answer.

A few ideas came up, but one stood out immediately.

I want to work with multiple companies at once. I want to build products, shape strategy, help businesses grow, and run my own thing.

Now the question isn’t whether I want that life. The question is how I start preparing for it today.

Because sometimes the most important thing you can give yourself isn’t an answer. It’s permission.

Permission to slow down.

Permission to change direction.

Permission to want something different from what you were taught success should look like.

Most of us grew up moving directly from one milestone to the next with no space in between. School, university, job, promotion, next job.

We become attached to titles and salaries because that’s the framework we’ve been handed for success and happiness.

But for the first time in a long time, I feel like I know what actually makes me happy.

And now it’s up to me to build the path that gets me there.

See you in the next note,

Janice