You're Gonna Die Someday No Matter How Young You Look

Many months ago, I ordered too many party favors for the FLESH WORLD relaunch + the LA The Hole Debate. My mistake = your merch.

Now available…

The “YOU’RE GONNA DIE SOMEDAY NO MATTER HOW YOUNG YOU LOOK” Bumper Sticker, $7 — a nod to my newsletter sign-off.

Buy It

The “YOU LOOK BAD” mirror cling, $7 — an answer (antidote?) to Glossier’s beloved You Look Good mirror decals.

Buy It

The “GET OFF MY HOLE!” Bumper Sticker, $7 — a message to the burgeoning butthole beauty category (and your fellow drivers).

Buy It

The “HONK IF YOU <3 YOUR HOLE” Bumper Sticker, $7 — ditto.

Buy It

More details here.

For now, shipping is only available in the United States. If you’re outside of the US and want to order, please email me or leave a comment below; I’ll try to work out an international shipping option if there’s enough demand!

Finally, a disclaimer: It’s taken me nearly a year to make these available for purchase because 1) I famously hate beauty merch and 2) I hate being a hypocrite. But some of these extra favors have been sitting in my closet for 10+ months now; it’d be less wasteful to sell them to people who will actually love and use them. Quantities are limited and won’t be restocked! Enjoy.