Where are your kids?

Hey Friends:

Should you insist that your teenagers have a tracking app on their phones so you know where they are at all times?

Rita and I never had to deal with that question because that wasn’t really a thing when our kids were in high school. (There were plenty of other parent/teen questions!)

Honestly, I can’t imagine suddenly insisting your sophomore install that app. Even if they are the most trustworthy teenager in the world, they would not be happy.

On the other hand, when you give a middle schooler their first phone, that’s a perfect opportunity for you to insist on all kinds of limits and monitoring apps. If you plan for it, that can be an easy conversation with minimum eye rolling.

Yes, the phone is a necessity these days, but it is also a privilege.

Acquiring that first phone is one of those rare occasions when parents can lay down rules and expectations and the kids have no option except to agree. You may even want to write down that tidy list of rules. Make it a signable contract. Most of the rules should probably focus on phone usage and all those available apps. Things like no phones at the dinner table, answer when we call, never use a phone while driving, and so on. This would also be a good time to talk about scammers, cyberbullying, keeping passwords secret, and other risky cell phone business.

If there’s one or two discipline issues you’re struggling with, you may even want to connect those with whether or not they have access to their precious phone. That’s a hard conversation, but the timing might be exactly right.

As for our adults kids? Rita and I know where they are! All we have to do is look at the signpost in our backyard to remind us of the location of Alec, Randall, Max, Isaac, and Rae Anne.

Best,

/jay

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