Member Library: She Was a 397 Year Old Virgin, He Was 19 (a romantasy parody, Part I)

A little context to share before you read on as I talk to a lot of people who do not read the romantasy (romance + fantasy) genre as much I do. So in the style of parody, I am flipping the script on the common narrative of a 500 year old lead male character falling in love with a 19 year old female character. It is almost every series I have read that they is about a 400+ age gap. And yes, one MMC (main male character) was a 500 year old virgin and his name is Nyktos. So writing a script flip for you today, a meetcute and Part I of a story that came to me on a run today. I hope you enjoy….

She felt the zip up her spine. The drop in the belly. Or was it a rise in the belly, they said, she didn’t know, she had never felt it before. But a sultry voice floated across the ether and caressed her insides.

Slowly, ever so slowly, she turned around to find the owner of that voice. At age 397, she was never in a rush. She learned a long time ago that impatient people make impatient decisions and she had done enough to make her cringe for the rest of her immortal life.

Scanning the space, though, she could not find him.

The event was full of hot heads anyways. Sage hated these pompous affairs but this one was for the local library, so she made her appearance, as she did every year drenched in sex appeal. Sex and books made sense to her. She gave an abhorrent amount of money to keep the books lining every single shelf, including her own very popular books. I guess sex in books also made sense to her and a lot of the people there who had read and re-read her works of art. No one there would ever have guessed her darkest secret, that while she could write the most tantalizing of tension, she had never experienced this connection of the page. Not with another. She obviously was well versed in how to pleasure herself, she would have never made it this many years orgasm-less. Good hell, as she always said aloud and in her books.

The voice came again, like a slow thunder off in the distance. This time, she turned a bit quicker - her curiosity getting the best of her. And she moved towards the gentle humming.

A large man in a maroon suit stepped aside and there was the voice and the man, a very young man. Skin soft and taut around his cheek bones, emphasized when he half smiled to whomever he was talking to. His brown hair tussled and obviously on purpose to look like he didn’t care and why does his shirt look a size too small?

Sage sighed and turned back to the bar. She leaned and laughed to herself a bit. All these years she knew the waiting game. An oracle years ago had told her love was on the other side of three centuries. As she closed in on late 300s, her patience had surrendered and she had almost entirely let go of the notion. Like the final sliver of a crescent moon, all that was left was a curvaceous line of hope.

She felt eyes on her.
She felt eyes all over her.

Most people here knew she kept the libraries open with her donations. And each year, some reporter or non-profit organization would want to bend her ear, become her ‘friend’ or congratulate her on all her successes as a writer. She would appease the brave enough souls to cross the energetic circle she so carefully drew around her. It was a boundary, a space for containment, a protection and a guard - she had been burned before.

A large, calloused hand barely hovered over her lower back.

She turned around half smiling, ready to perform her act of financial friendliness, when she bumped into an unyielding presence and bounced right off of him. The electric hum in her body, it had returned.

And he was there with that half smile now turned directly to her. He brushed his hand, the one that was just upon her back, through his hair and he laughed and told her, “I hope you don’t mind the intrusion, I have been wanting to meet you.”

His youth is endearing.
His half smile, though, dangerous.

She placed her manicured hand on her own curvaceous line and nodded.