Today is also the day that Interest of Justice served summons on the United States government in our mandamus action, the case that proves the Department of Defense never had the legally required report that would have included informed consent provisions before conducting what amounts to biological agent experiments on civilians under the COVID vaccine rollout.
The timing is not lost on us.
Because what the U.S. government did to its own people follows an identical playbook to what millions of survivors of narcissistic abuse recognize in their own homes, their own families, their own relationships. And until we understand the psychology behind it, at every level, from the kitchen table to the Capitol, we will keep falling for it.
So here’s to awareness of this unique type of abuse. Here’s to understanding how it affects so many people and why we cannot change the world or clear the generational curses without full awareness of what we’re actually dealing with. That’s why we’re not stopping after one day. We are going to continue to bring this topic back, again and again, until we build a tribe of aware, conscious warriors standing up for our true selves against the false masks and the manipulators hiding behind them.
Because that’s what this really comes down to. The children of the light versus the children of the darkness and the lie. We are the children of truth and light. They are the children of the dark and the lie. And they look the same at first glance. You can’t tell them apart at a dinner party, in a boardroom, in a movement, or in your own bed. But with enough education, with enough awareness, with enough of us saying no more — we are going to change these generational curses. We are going to clear the patterns. We are going to dig in and create a new generation that sees through the mask before the damage is done.
This article is the first in what I’m calling Narcissistic Abuse Awareness Year, because one day of awareness is an insult to survivors. If you’ve lived through this kind of abuse, you know that it takes years to untangle what happened to you, and a 24-hour awareness ribbon does not begin to cover it. We’re going deeper, and we’re going longer.
Before we go any further, there is one concept that will change the way you see everything, from your personal relationships to the evening news.
DARVO stands for Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender. It was identified by researcher Jennifer Freyd, and once you see it, you cannot unsee it.
Here’s how it works. Someone hurts you. You name the harm to the one who caused the harm looking for repair. And then, in three seamless moves, they flip the entire script upside down into delusion-ville.
Deny — “That never happened.” “I never said that.” “You’re remembering it wrong.”
Attack — “You’re the one with the problem.” “You’re crazy.” “You’re being dramatic.” “You need therapy.”
Reverse Victim and Offender — And this is where the real destruction happens. Suddenly they are the victim. You are the abuser. They are the one being “harassed,” “attacked,” “bullied.” They tell your friends. They tell your family. They tell the court system. And because they are so convincing, because the mask is so good, people believe them. You find yourself defending your own reality to people who should be on your side.
At the personal level, DARVO sounds like your partner calling you “controlling” when you ask why they didn’t come home or did something you disagree with. At work your boss says your work sucks when they are the ones who slacked off and you did a really great job. At the institutional level, DARVO sounds like a government telling its citizens that questioning an experimental medical rollout makes them the danger to public health. Same mechanism. Same playbook. Different scale.
If you take nothing else from this article, take this — learn to recognize DARVO. Teach it to your children. Teach it to your friends. Because once you see the pattern, you are exponentially harder to manipulate.
Most people hear “narcissist” and picture someone who takes too many selfies or talks about themselves at parties. That misunderstanding is exactly what allows narcissistic abuse to thrive. It’s not vanity. It’s a predatory operating system. YOU are the prey.
And here’s what makes it so different from “normal” conflict or even “normal” abuse — narcissistic abuse is strategic. It is not someone losing their temper. It is not a bad day. It is a calculated system of psychological warfare designed to control, isolate, and ultimately destroy the victim’s sense of reality, self-worth, and connection to others.
It includes things that sound almost unbelievable when you describe them to someone who hasn’t lived through it — the smear campaigns where the abuser turns your own community against you, the flying monkeys (friends, family members, colleagues) who unknowingly do the abuser’s work for them, the intermittent reinforcement where cruelty alternates with intense affection to keep you trauma-bonded, and the mobbing where the abuser orchestrates multiple people to target you simultaneously.
It is very, very different from normal abuse. It is insidious. It is effective. And it is devastating for families, for children, for movements, for society, and for the legal systems that are supposed to protect us.
All these can be on their own or may show up as combined… Theres a ton of overlap!
Pay attention - Devils in the details!
Cluster B personality disorders include narcissistic personality disorder, antisocial personality disorder, borderline personality disorder, and histrionic personality disorder. But the personality traits that cause the most systematic, predatory harm are the ones that psychologists group into what they call the Dark Triad and the Dark Tetrad. Understanding these is not optional anymore. This is survival information.
NARCISSISM (Narcissistic Personality Disorder)
This is the engine of entitlement. The narcissist genuinely believes they are special, superior, and deserving of admiration and compliance. They are GOD so they fully and completely lack the ability to truly empathize with others, though they can perform empathy brilliantly when it serves them. They need a constant supply of attention, praise, and control, and when that supply is threatened, they become dangerous. The narcissistic personalities are truly dangerous to people emotionally, psychologically, financially and sometimes even physically.
How to spot it — The grandiose talk about themselves constantly but show no genuine curiosity about your inner world. When you share your pain, they redirect the conversation back to themselves. The covert types are LITERALLY impossible to see up front, but both types are the same because they cannot tolerate criticism, not even gentle feedback. They keep score. Every gift, every favor, every act of “kindness” is a transaction they will cash in later. THEY ONLY GIVE TO GET.
MACHIAVELLIANISM
Named after Niccolò Machiavelli, this is the strategist of the group and possibly the most dangerous. The Machiavellian is a long-term plotter. They don’t act impulsively. They plan. They manipulate. They play people against each other. They form alliances not out of genuine connection but to position themselves advantageously. They will smile at you while engineering your downfall, and you will never see it coming because the timeline of their deception can span years or even decades.
How to spot it — Watch what they do, not what they say. Their words are always perfect. Their actions, over time, tell a different story. They are the ones who somehow always come out ahead while everyone around them is in chaos. They create problems and then offer to solve them. They position themselves as indispensable while quietly making sure nobody else can function without them.
PSYCHOPATHY (Antisocial Personality Disorder)
This is the switch that turns off empathy. The psychopath does not feel remorse, guilt, or emotional connection the way a healthy human does. “Antisocial” does not mean they are loners or awkward — it means they operate against social norms. Their behavior is fundamentally anti-social in the truest sense. It is not in line with what is acceptable. It is not normal. They can mimic warmth, humor, and love with stunning precision, but behind the performance there is nothing. Or worse, there is enjoyment.
How to spot it — Look at what happens when you’re at your most vulnerable. A psychopath’s mask slips during your crisis, not theirs. Watch their eyes when you cry. Notice whether they seem energized or bored by your pain. Pay attention to whether their stories about other people involve a suspicious number of “crazy” exes, “ungrateful” friends, and people who “screwed them over.” Everyone in their past is the villain. They are always the victim.
EVERYDAY SADISM (the Fourth of the Tetrad)
This is the trait that upgrades the Dark Triad into the Dark Tetrad, and it’s the one nobody talks about. Everyday sadism is not the dramatic sadism of horror films. It’s the quiet enjoyment of watching others squirm. It’s the smirk when you’re crying. It’s the partner who provokes you until you snap and then calmly films your reaction as “evidence.” It’s the person who delivers devastating news casually, then watches your face fall with something that looks almost like satisfaction. It’s the late-night intimidation texts at 3 AM designed to make you panic, because your panic is their power. These are the gang-stalkers and yes, also of course the trolls.
How to spot it — Trust your body. If someone’s presence makes you feel consistently anxious, destabilized, or like you’re walking on eggshells, and yet they haven’t done anything you can point to and say “that’s it,” you may be dealing with a sadist who operates just below the threshold of what you can name. Your nervous system is picking up what your conscious mind hasn’t caught yet. Trust your gut above anything else.
I’m a LIGHT Triad kind of person… Light over might!
Do you choose to do what’s right?
Here’s where it gets truly dangerous. The overt narcissist is grandiose, loud, obviously arrogant. Frankly, they’re the easiest to spot and avoid.
The covert narcissist is something else entirely. They present as humble, selfless, empathetic. They are the person everyone in the community admires — the helper, the caretaker, the one who “gives so much.” They can maintain this mask for years. Decades. They blend in so seamlessly that even the people closest to them have no idea what’s underneath.
Until the mask comes off. It comes off when you really need accountability and hold your boundaries against their promises and inconsistency.
And when it does, the dissonance is so extreme that the victim often cannot process it. How can the person who seemed to care so deeply about the mission, the family, the cause, suddenly act with such calculated cruelty? The answer is that they never cared about the mission. They cared about the identity the mission gave them. The admiration. The accolades. The image of being the good one. When that supply is threatened or no longer needed, the mask drops, and what’s underneath is cold, strategic, and willing to destroy anything and anyone to protect the false self.
The covert narcissist-psychopath overlap is the most dangerous combination in the Dark Tetrad. They are both narcissistic and psychopathic, and yet they completely blend in. You cannot tell that they’re a narcissist. You really can’t. Not for years. Not even after a lifetime of being in a relationship with one. And when the mask finally drops and you start seeing the truth, you are profoundly vulnerable, because your very human instinct is to want to fix them, love them, and heal them. But this type of disorder is not a wound that heals with enough love. It is a fundamental operating system, and your job is not to fix it. Your job is to understand it and protect yourself and your loved ones.
A healthy person might get defensive at first, but they will eventually engage. They will reflect. They will adjust. A narcissist will destroy you for it. Those two words — boundaries and accountability — are kryptonite to them. They will rage. They will punish you. They will give silent treatment or launch a full campaign to make you regret ever asking for basic human decency. And if they do say sorry — watch what happens next. They do the exact same thing again, because the apology was never real. It was lip service designed to get you to stop holding them accountable so they can go right back to the behavior. That cycle — offense, fake apology, repeat — can go on for years, dozens of times, until the final discard of their victim who no longer performs their role. And that is the litmus test. If someone cannot be held accountable, if they cannot genuinely apologize and change the behavior, if saying “I need a boundary” triggers their wrath — you are dealing with a narcissist. Full stop. See it clearly. Its RIGID.
There is one concept that explains almost everything a narcissist does, and it’s called narcissistic supply. Think of it as a drug. The narcissist is an addict, and the drug is attention — any form of it.
Here’s the part that shocks people. The supply doesn’t have to be positive. Adulation, praise, admiration — that’s premium supply. But hatred, rage, fear, confusion, tears — that works too. Any emotional reaction that confirms they have power over you is supply. Your worship feeds them. Your devastation feeds them just as well. They literally do not care which one they get, as long as they get something. It’s not about love. It’s not about connection. It’s about extraction.
This is why they provoke you. This is why they say the cruelest thing possible at the moment you’re most vulnerable. This is why they send the midnight text designed to send you spiraling. They are farming your reaction. Your pain is their hit.
And this is why, when you finally stop reacting — when you go grey rock, when you stop engaging, when the supply dries up — they don’t stay and try to work things out. They move on. Immediately. They find the next source of supply, the next victim, and they lock in faster than you can process what just happened. While you are still reeling, still trying to solve things, still hoping to get back the person from the love-bombing phase, they have already charmed someone new. They have already told the new person how “crazy” you are. They are already performing the version of themselves that you fell in love with, but for someone else. ITS TEXTBOOK.
They dump you and move on like you never existed, because to them, you didn’t. You were a supply source. The new person is the next supply source. When that one dries up, there will be another. It’s not personal. And somehow, that makes it even worse.
This pattern plays out in relationships, in workplaces, in families, in friendships, and yes — in governments. When a population stops complying, the institution doesn’t reflect and reform. It finds new mechanisms of control. Same addiction. Different scale.
There’s a subtype that is particularly relevant to anyone working in advocacy, justice, or social movements — the communal narcissist. This person doesn’t seek admiration through wealth or status. They seek it through being perceived as the most caring, the most devoted, the most indispensable to the cause.
They volunteer more than anyone. They’re the first to sign up and the last to leave. They want everyone to know how much they sacrifice. But look closer. Do they actually follow through? Do the things they promised to handle actually get done? Or do they create an impressive performance of dedication while quietly leaving critical work undone — work that someone else will have to scramble to complete?
The communal narcissist doesn’t care about the mission. They care about being seen caring about the mission. And when they leave — and they always eventually leave, because the supply dries up or a shinier cause comes along — they leave a trail of unfiled documents, broken promises, burden shifted onto others, and bewildered people wondering what just happened. They don’t mind putting an enormous burden on the people left behind. All they ever cared about was the accolades and being looked up to. The actual mission was never the point.
If you’ve worked in advocacy, in nonprofits, in justice movements, you have encountered this person. They are everywhere. And until we name this dynamic, we cannot protect our movements from it.
Interest of Justice has not been immune to these dynamics. We have learned these lessons firsthand. The work continues — stronger, clearer, and with a deeper understanding of why vetting character matters as much as vetting credentials.
What makes narcissistic abuse so uniquely devastating is that it’s not just emotional abuse. It is a system. It follows a precise, recognizable pattern whether it’s happening in a marriage, a workplace, an organization, or a government.
Love Bombing & Idealization— Overwhelming you with attention, promises, and idealization. At the institutional level, this sounds like “We’re all in this together. Heroes work here. Trust the science. We care about you.”
Devaluation — Gradually tearing down your worth, questioning your judgment, isolating you from support. At the institutional level, this sounds like “You’re spreading misinformation. You’re selfish. You’re a danger to others.”
Discard — Abandoning you when you’re no longer useful, often replacing you immediately with a new source of supply. At the institutional level, the healthcare workers who were heroes in 2020 were fired in 2021 for asking questions. At the personal level, they walk out the door and into someone else’s bed before you’ve even finished crying, because you were never a person to them. You were a supply source that ran dry.
Replace — After the devalue/discard the new supply is immediately set up to replace the old one and the pattern goes on and on ad nauseum, ad infinitum.
DARVO — Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender. After discarding you, they tell everyone you’re the abuser in the wrong. They are the victim. You are the monster. And people somehow believe them like clockwork. Its really bizarre.
Smear Campaign — Mobilizing the community, the family, the institution against the victim. This is where narcissistic abuse diverges from ordinary conflict. It’s not one person hurting another. It’s one person weaponizing everyone else against you, so that you are isolated, discredited, and unable to seek help without being told you’re the problem.
The Flying Monkeys — The friends, family members, colleagues, and community members who side with the abuser, often saying things like “I love you both” or “I don’t want to take sides” or “Just stop talking about it.” They don’t realize they’ve been recruited. They don’t realize they’re doing the abuser’s work. But they are. And one of the most painful parts of narcissistic abuse is watching people you trusted become instruments of the person who is destroying you.
And then comes the double whammy that breaks people. You finally find the courage to say “I’m being abused” and the people you turn to — your own friends, your own family, sometimes even your therapist — look at you and say “Oh come on, they’re not that bad. You’re exaggerating. Everyone’s a little crazy. Just play nice. Just get over it.” They cannot fathom that the charming, helpful, beloved person you’re describing is a monster behind closed doors, because the mask is that good. So now you’re not just being abused by one person. You’re being gaslit by everyone around you. The abuser is feeding them an entire storyline about how unstable you are, how dramatic, how vindictive, and those people swallow it whole because it’s easier than confronting the uncomfortable truth that someone they like is capable of calculated cruelty. Meanwhile the abuser is playing the victim themselves — classic DARVO — and your own support system becomes an extension of the abuse. You are left in a complete state of shock and bewilderment, not knowing who to turn to, not knowing who to trust, reaching out for a lifeline and being handed more gaslighting instead. That isolation is not a side effect of narcissistic abuse. It is the goal. And it is the biggest mindfuck of all.
This pattern repeats at every scale. In relationships. In families. In organizations. In governments. Same playbook. Same devastation. Just a different scope and scale.
When Interest of Justice filed this mandamus action to stop covid vaccines as illegal experiments last month, we weren’t just filing a legal case. We were refusing to participate in the collective gaslighting. We were saying, you told us these were safe, you told us we had no choice, you told us the science was settled. And we have now proven, with the government’s own records, that the Department of Defense never even had the report required by law — the one that should have included informed consent provisions before conducting biological agent research involving civilians.
That’s not a policy disagreement. That’s institutional DARVO at the highest level. And today, World Narcissistic Abuse Awareness Day, the summons went out. The government is about to find out what it looks like when someone refuses to be gaslit.
Some nations are beginning to recognize that narcissistic abuse is not “just” emotional abuse of a normal variety — it is a pattern of coercive control that should carry legal consequences.
United Kingdom — The Serious Crime Act 2015 made coercive and controlling behavior a criminal offense, carrying up to 5 years imprisonment. This was groundbreaking legislation.
Scotland — The Domestic Abuse (Scotland) Act 2018 goes even further, specifically recognizing psychological abuse and patterns of behavior.
Ireland — The Domestic Violence Act 2018 criminalized coercive control with up to 12 months, or 5 years on indictment.
Australia — Tasmania and several states have incorporated coercive control into domestic violence laws. New South Wales and Queensland have been advancing standalone criminalization.
France — Has recognized psychological harassment (harcèlement moral) as a criminal offense since 2010.
Hawaii, USA — In 2020 became one of the first U.S. states to explicitly include coercive control in its domestic abuse definitions.
Connecticut, California, and several other U.S. states have been advancing legislation recognizing coercive control.
Costa Rica, where Interest of Justice operates, has strong domestic violence protections under Ley 7586, which recognizes psychological violence as a form of domestic violence — but there is room for more specific recognition of coercive control as a distinct pattern of behavior.
We need more. Every country. Every jurisdiction. Coercive control should be as clearly defined and prosecuted as physical assault. The science supports it. The survivors demand it. People lobbying for these protections in creating new laws are underway and that is a VERY good thing. Name it, shame it and prosecute it dammit!
One day is not enough. This is the beginning.
Over the coming months, Interest of Justice will be publishing a series exploring how to identify the covert narcissist before the mask comes off, the neuroscience of trauma bonding and why smart strong people stay, narcissistic abuse and the family court system and how abusers weaponize it, communal narcissism in advocacy movements, the Dark Tetrad and institutional power, raising children who can recognize these patterns and break the generational curses, and healing after narcissistic abuse — what actually works and why “just get over it” is itself a form of abuse.
Because that’s the thing people don’t understand. Roughly 3 to 5 percent of the population has these disorders. Three to five percent. And that small fraction wreaks absolute havoc on businesses, families, love affairs, movements, governments, and entire generations. It’s up to the rest of us — the 95 percent — to create a new system that is aware of this and stops telling survivors to just get over it.
No. Don’t get over it. We are going to bring it out into the light, because it is dark and we have to shed light on it. It’s real. It hurts a lot of people. It’s not fair. And it is a complete travesty of justice.
Here’s what I believe with every fiber of my being.
If we can sit down and actually digest this, if we can resist the urge to brush it aside because it’s uncomfortable, if we can really latch onto this understanding and teach each other and protect each other and give validation to the survivors and support them in clearing this energy from their lives — we can create a really beautiful new pattern for the next generation.
It is up to us and only us. Nobody is coming to save us from this. The systems are not designed to protect against it. The courts are only just beginning to understand it. The schools don’t teach it. The therapists are still catching up. It is on us to educate ourselves, protect our children, and build the awareness that makes this kind of abuse impossible to hide behind.
This generational curse is demonic in nature and must be wiped from the face of the earth as the scourge of evil and harm that it is. It is disobedience to truth and light. It is antisocial in the truest sense of the word — fundamentally against what is acceptable in a healthy society. It is not normal. It is not something to minimize. And it will not stop until we stop treating it as a private family matter and start treating it as the public health crisis and justice crisis that it is.
Interest of Justice has been affected by these dynamics. My own life — Lady Xylie’s own life — has been profoundly affected by them. And I am proud to use that experience as fuel, not to expose anyone or be vindictive, but to help heal the generational curses. That is my greatest honor in this life. To make this awareness happen. To make sure the next generation has the tools that we didn’t have. To make sure that no child grows up believing that the person who is hurting them is the person they should trust the most.
We are the children of truth and light. We are the ones who see clearly and refuse to look away. And we are not going to stop seeing through the disordered deceptions.
If you’ve experienced narcissistic abuse, you have a voice here in the comments. Please share your story, your experience, your advice, or just a word of solidarity in the comments below. I think far more people are dealing with this than anyone realizes, and sometimes the most powerful thing a survivor can hear is that they are not alone and they are not crazy. Your voice matters. Drop a comment - I send you love and hugs!
Interest of Justice is a nonprofit advocating for justice at every level — from the family to the international stage. Follow the mandamus case and join the healing party as we commence the Narcissistic Abuse Awareness Year series right here on our Substack.
If this article resonated with you, share it with someone who needs to see it. The light only wins when we turn it on. Generational Curses be Damned with all evil and wicked schemes!!!
Interest of Justice runs on truth, stubbornness, and your support. We don't have corporate sponsors. We don't have institutional backing. We have you. If this article helped you see something more clearly, if this series is the kind of awareness you want more of in the world, a donation keeps the lights on and the masks coming off. Every dollar goes directly to the fight — from the mandamus against the U.S. government to protecting families from the exact patterns we just described. The narcissists have unlimited audacity. We just need a little fuel & love to keep spreading the light!
Tomorrow A Federal Judge Gets The Case. Covid “Vaccine” Experiments On Trial!
When Institutions Act Like Narcissists
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