Stuck in Midlife

The “midlife crisis” is a complicated beast involving many emotions, but an image popped in my head that illustrates it so well. ChatGPT 5.0 was kind enough to bring it to life… since you can’t see in my mind. (Yeah, you don’t want to do that.)

I simplify the concept of a midlife crisis—or even just midlife—as being stuck between the walls of past regrets and future worries. That is exactly what it is, in a nutshell. Beyond that, I struggle to explain it to anyone that isn’t going through it themselves. I once again sought ChatGPT’s help.

Gregory: What is a midlife crisis?

ChatGPT: A midlife crisis is a period of emotional questioning and transition that some people experience in their late 30s to mid-50s. It often happens when someone reflects on the first half of their life and starts wondering about meaning, purpose, and what they want from the years ahead.

It isn’t always dramatic or destructive (despite the stereotypes like sports cars and drastic lifestyle changes).

It went on to list common feelings:

• Restlessness or boredom

• Regret or nostalgia about missed opportunities

• Worry about aging or mortality

• Desire for change or reinvention

• Feeling “stuck” between youth and old age

I found myself mostly nodding in agreement. Restlessness: yes. Boredom: I’m inclined to say no, but my yearning for new experiences and adventure says otherwise. Regret: definitely. Worry: certainly. Desire for change or reinvention: change, not so much; reinvention, possibly. Feeling “stuck”: it’s more about being stuck between regrets and worries. I’d actually love to be stuck between youth and old age, but feel as if I’m hurtling, faster and faster, towards the latter.

As ChatGPT described common behaviors, I continued to nod:

• Changing careers or life goals

• Revisiting past passions or relationships

• Making big lifestyle or appearance changes

• Seeking therapy or self-improvement

• Pursuing new hobbies or adventures

What causes a midlife crisis? According to our “expert”:

• Children growing up [doesn’t apply]

• Career plateau or burnout [a little of each]

• Health changes [feeling the effects of aging and weight gain, yes]

• Losses or major milestones [more on this in a moment]

• Greater awareness of time passing [this! THIS!]

The linchpin of my midlife crisis—as far as I can tell—was the sudden, unexpected loss of a beloved coworker, full of life and positivity in his sixties. It was a shock that jolted the feelings that were bubbling just under the surface. I was forced to look at, question, my own mortality. From there, I went into full-on midlife crisis mode.

Predating that awful incident, there was my relationship with time. Time in our youth seems limitless. But as we get older—and I’m not the only one to declare this—time appears to go by at a different speed. The older we get, the faster time goes by.

Not fair, I declare. Stop fast-forwarding. Hit the pause.

But there is no pause. Damn it, Time, why don’t you have a pause button?

I blame time. I’ve even gone so far as to call time my enemy. But that’s not right. Actually, it’s all wrong.

Time is the most precious of friends.

ChatGPT gives me a moment to process my reflections, then continues by looking on the bright side. Don’t think of it as a “midlife crisis” but a “midlife awakening.” It provides the opportunity to:

• Re-evaluate priorities

• Strengthen relationships

• Focus on well-being

• Explore new interests

• Live with more authenticity and intention

It is with In Midlife that I hope to manifest these opportunities. I hope you’ll join me on this midlife awakening journey.