Oops, I psyched myself out from writing for over 10 weeks

I read a post from Grace Walker recently that hit home: “A lot of learning a new tool is just being able to stomach feeling really dumb while you learn it.”

Boy, do I know how that feels.

I wasn’t happy about my progress, so I didn’t want to write about it.

Why? Probably a combo of fear, imposter syndrome, caring a lot about it all.

The last 3 months of my life, I’ve been pushing through and looking for a break through moment.

I still don’t feel like I’m there, but at least I’m shipping things that excite me.

Remember the learning styles I mentioned in newsletter #2?

Six weeks ago, I was stuck in tutorial hell, doing things on autopilot. I needed to turn these learning roadblocks into lego blocks - you know, make the knowledge actually stack!

What finally clicked?

• Asking for help (Major shoutout to Ashita! 🙌)

• Using life's curveballs as motivation (RIP my sweet Khloe ❤️)

• Follow the heck thru and just. keep. going

Here’s what happened: the good, the bad, and the dumb looking things AI has built for me.

I used Visual Electric, an AI image generator, to put together these visuals. I wanted a cross over of Adventure Time and Hello Kitty aesthetics. I really dug the descriptions on Visual Electric’s properties controls. It wasn’t overwhelming in the amount of controls and I could save a certain style to replicate easily with another prompt.

I tried using Claude to create the character creation flow, but I kept getting stuck with moving past one screen of development.

A music social app, kinda like apples to apples, but with songs

I managed to connect Cursor to Claude and Replit. I learned how to define my project better and picked up a tip from Matt about creating a PRD markdown and a todos markdown with all the work that needs to be done–broken down by frontend, backend, full-stack, and a step-by-step guide in markdown as to how to build it.

Even with these things, I kept getting stuck with project setup and again, not being able to create things past one screen.

After these two, I got kinda burned out. I felt like almost 70% of the time, I was just trying to get packages to run correctly.

Sometimes when you keep running into the same problems over and over again, you have to take a step back to get perspective.

Even though I wanted to continue both the cat mmo and music game, it seemed a bit too complex as starter projects for me to create, especially with both of them being multiplayer games with game logic associated to them.

So… I took a detour, and did something that I was comfortable with for a bit. Getting COVID and dealing with persisting symptoms was a wrench in my motivation, so I indulged in some Inktober fun and discovered digital collaging.

After awhile, I knew I couldn't stay in la-la land. I had to get out of my comfort zone - which meant talking to others. I asked Ashita to help me get back on track with creating content, and lo and behold, she was going to ask me for the same thing! Look at this cute video she made about the funny way serendipity works. It gave me warm affirmation feels, and reminded me it’s okay to ask for help, and it can also be very powerful! 🥹

• What’s the goal and why?

• What’s the niche you’re orienting towards?

• What are your strengths?

• How do you know if you’ve succeeded with what you’re promoting?

• Who is inspiring you right now and why?

I started this side project, because after my cat passed away and I tried to find a digital memorial space for her. All the ones I found were super ugly. It gave me something to focus on instead of grieving.

Then I realized this was somewhat of an easy project to do and it was my first fully custom framer project. Now I’ve linked up with Mahnaz Hajesmaeili, who is also on a similar AI coding journey as me, to continue building it!

We’re moving into Week 5 of the project and I’ll be trying Linear for the first time, as well as revisiting AI coding.

• I dipped my feet back into webflow for a Sprintfolio project for NPI Consulting House, and now I’m working with 4 other early career designers to conduct research and do another round of improvements.

• I am working with a stealth AI startup to launch a new product. More to come on this later 🙂

The past year has been intense - lots of community building, sprint support for early career designers, and pure hustle. With my day job contract ending in about 3 months (and while I hope it renews), I'm looking to find ways to make this passion more financially sustainable.

Please join my learning journey and supporting it by…

🤠 Subscribing to this newsletter

💌 Forwarding this subscribe link to a friend

☕ Buying me a coffee

🌱 Purchasing my first gumroad Notion Template: Design Career Garden System

🐝 Grabbing the beta access of uncoverLAB, a platform with 360+ vectorized website sections, to speed up your design process. *This is what I used for Meow Memory Lane and and NPI Consulting House for a super fast turnaround!