Trump Scores Big with China

While walking with Premier Xi in Beijing’s ​walled-off Zhongnanhai compound on his recent visit to China, President Donald J. Trump asked if the roses could be eaten. “I’ve never been inside a grocery store.”

“Of course, Mr. President,” Xi replied with an enigmatic smile. “Just be careful of the thorns.”

“These are the most beautiful roses anyone’s ever seen!” added Trump as quoted in the New York Post. “‘Could you get me some for the Rose Garden?’ and he said ‘yes.’ I’ve never seen roses so big!”

The admired seeds will arrive in Washington on a weather balloon, said Xi. Trump asked if they could be delivered in a big beautiful new Boeing jet purchased from the US instead, but Xi said his country now preferred the European Airbus.

On the hop back to DC on Airforce One, Trump turned to Marco Rubio and Elon Musk and commented further, “The fuck! They don’t even let you turn on your phone in that vegetable garden!”

And so it goes—

Share

A QUICK VERSION OF THE HOT GLOBE FOLLIES, HERE. I’VE BEEN OFF SCHEDULE WRITING A NEW BOOK ABOUT FUNGI AND A REMARKABLE PIONEER IN BIOTECHNOLOGY. BUT THIS WEEK WE MUST RETURN TO THE CALIFORNIA GOVERNOR’S ELECTION. HOT GLOBE IS GOING FOR TOM STEYER, BEST, WE BELIEVE, FOR CLIMATE AND THE ENVIRONMENT.

STEVE CHAPPLE IS A FORMER VISITING SCHOLAR AT THE SCRIPPS INSTITUTION OF OCEANOGRAPHY, A SR. FELLOW AT THE SAMUEL LAWRENCE FOUNDATION, AND THE AUTHOR OF 8 REASONABLY GOOD BOOKS, including BREAKPOINT: Reckoning with America’s Environmental Crises (Yale) and LET THE MOUNTAINS TALK (David Brower with Steve Chapple.)