The Mutant Mirror: Autism, Identity, and the X-Men

I know the X-Men as a whole mean a lot of different things to a lot of different people.

To me, the X-Men are about fighting for your place in a world that tells you that you do not belong. They are about learning that your uniqueness is your superpower, and that the very things that make you different are what make you special. They are also about the reality that people often fear what they do not understand.

I do not have time to go through every character, so I want to focus on the two who resonate most with me: Rogue and Mystique. In many ways, they represent opposite sides of the same coin. Rogue wants nothing more than a normal life, while Mystique wants mutants to have an established and respected place in the world.

Rogue desperately wants a cure. More than anything, she wants to be able to touch people and physically connect with them without fear. When a cure becomes available, she does not hesitate to take it. The autism community is deeply divided on the cure-versus-no-cure debate, so I will not try to settle that conversation here. What I can say is that my feelings about it have changed over time. In middle school and high school, I would have given almost anything to be like everyone else. If a cure had been available, I probably would have taken it, although I would have let a few waves of volunteers test it first so we could see the side effects. As I got older, however, and began to accept myself for who I am, my perspective changed. Today, I am not sure I would make the same choice.

Mystique’s story resonates with me for a different reason. She has the ability to change her appearance and blend in with those around her. To me, that reflects the experience of masking, especially for autistic women. I have often been called a chameleon because of my ability to adapt to whatever social environment I am in. There is a different version of Sydney for school, work, my inner circle, friends, acquaintances, and family.

The part people do not talk about is what happens after years of changing yourself to fit every situation. Eventually, you start to lose track of who you really are. Who is Sydney beneath all those versions of herself?

A few years ago, I realized I did not actually know the answer. I had spent so much time adapting to everyone else that I had never stopped to define myself. I literally sat down and made a list of traits from each version of “Sydney” and compared them to find the qualities they all shared. It took me an embarrassingly long time to figure out, but in the end, I discovered something important: beneath all the masks, there was still a real me. I just had to take the time to find her.

The reason the X-Men have always resonated with me is not because of the powers, the costumes, or the battles. It is because their stories reflect a very human experience: trying to find where you belong in a world that often misunderstands you. Whether it is Rogue wishing she could be “normal” or Mystique hiding parts of herself to fit in, I see pieces of my own journey in both of them. Over time, I have learned that my goal is not to be cured, fixed, or perfectly accepted by everyone around me. My goal is to understand and accept myself. The X-Men taught me that being different is not something to overcome. It is something to embrace. What makes us different is often what makes us extraordinary

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