We Are So Back — RHOC Season 20.

Tomorrow’s the day. We’ve been filming, fighting (LOL, kidding!) bonding, traveling, wine-ing and whining. It’s Real Housewives of Orange County’s twentieth (!!) season premiere tomorrow, and it’s crazy to think it’ll be my 10th.

We started the show when my youngest was 9 months old, and he’s going to be 16 years-old in December…insane!

I joined the show in Season 7. At that time, there were no other actors — and in my industry, doing reality was very looked down upon and I honestly thought it was the last nail in the coffin that had been my career.

Right away, I learned how the landscape of television was changing, and what an incredible platform it was and has obviously become exponentially better over the years. I have this joke about The Bachelor; it’s like, spoiler alert: the kids on The Bachelor aren’t looking for love, they’re looking for followers. I think back then, even if you kind of knew what you were getting into, you didn’t really understand what you were getting into…right?

I thought, I can do this! We just show our lives, it’s not a big deal! This should be fun. Then you’re filming, and you think, holy shit, because you really don’t know how it’s all going to end up. After all these years of Reality TV – not just Housewives, but The Bachelor and Summer House, and The Real World, and Big Brother, and all these series we have now, the people that are watching are savvier, the people being cast on them are savvier, and it really just changes the whole dynamic.

It makes me nostalgic! Tamra and I talk about this a lot — how her, Shannon, Vicky, and I, are like the four originals in the way each of us sort of changed the trajectory of the show. BTW, there have been incredible cast members over the years, but Vicki started it; and then Tamra came in and introduced us to the concept of “we love to hate her” LOL. Shannon brought this zany, kooky, off-kilter fun that we needed. And then there was me, the one who brought a luxury lifestyle and a functioning marriage to the scene. Marriage is hard, and we’re not perfect — but we always say, we survived the reality TV curse!! Despite popular belief, my hot take is that filming a show like this doesn’t kill a marriage, but it does polarize what’s already going on at home.

This is called your life, you develop relationships and meet people. In life, we all go through phases — people come in and out of your life as you evolve. I think the same is true of reality TV. We are all sorority sisters in a way, and there’s a common bond between us, but depending on the season and what you’re going through, you may be closer with one person from year to year or season to season.

I don’t know if I ever told you guys this, but I never watched the show before I joined the cast. I saw one scene where Tamra threw wine on Jeana and it was kind of funny and I thought OK, I get it, it’s like a satire! My first time filming ended up being with Tamra showing me a real estate property and while they were setting up, we were just standing at the bar chatting and we instantly started talking about our kids — it was our through line to friendship, as motherhood in all its forms tends to be. In this cast, we’re like war buddies – we’ve traveled together, we’ve laughed together, we’ve cried together, we’ve watched divorces happen, we’ve seen people get married. I sang at Tamra’s wedding. Even if you’re pissed at someone or you’re angry, you can find your way back.

We talk about everything — like our own parents and upbringing. Emily and I bonded last year over the similar way we grew up. I took her with me when I sprinkled my dad’s ashes in Amsterdam because we had really bonded over our parents, our husbands and our kids.

As you know, I started this journey on RHOC when my kids were small… when we were asked to come back to the show, we had a family meeting. I wanted to be super cognizant of the fact that my kids were sentient beings and I wanted to be 100% sure they were okay with this (they all were excited and supportive!) In the first part of this new season, we had a party that Nicky helped me host — he loves it. Nicky and I do a lot together in this space :) Maybe you saw our Chevy commercial on Insta, it was so fun! Some of my other kids don’t want to be as involved, and I totally respect that.

Looking back, no one explained to me how to do this thing… and it’s been a wild ride that I’m so grateful is still going!! I was a pageant girl plucked from nowhere and stuck in a sea of blondes; this East Coast actress who didn’t know any of these women’s stories or relationships or anything. I love looking back and seeing all the girls trips (I had never been on a girls trip before in my life, surprisingly ?!) and when my children were young, and the milestones we’ve been through as a family.

It’s my very Heather-Hot-Take that RHOC goes deeper into the cast’s personal lives than any other franchise. It’s not just about the drama of the group, but who we really are and what’s going on in our world. You’ll see, I had a tough time this first half of Season 20. I may have gotten in my own way, I don’t know. I’ll be watching with you ;)

Thanks for sipping down memory lane with me… tune in tomorrow, 8 p.m. ET on Bravo. I’ll be jumping in our Substack Chat, too. Meet me there?!