Bliss and Mouse Poop

First, there is the road.

Even with my four-wheel, bad-ass Toyota Tundra it is not guaranteed that I will be able to make it home.

It’s the mud.

Red clay that softens with rain into a pudding slurry so slippery that all you can do is keep your eyes locked on where you are going, breathe deep, and stay loose as you course correct like a jerking, dancing marionette to avoid sliding into the slushy sides which are waiting to trap you like quicksand. This same red clay then transfigures into a form of super glue, oozing into the most tractioned mud tires and setting into a rock-like substance that renders your expensive off-road tires basically bald.

I’ve actually only gotten stuck once in the mud up here in Northern New Mexico, on the east side of the Sangre de Christo mountains. Now my goal when I come home on a rainy day is to do the least amount of damage to the road by driving like a zen master and imagining my truck floating over the road. Happily, my neighbors and I have done tremendous amounts of work on our mile-long stretch of dirt road; there are only a few really dicey areas. And we all know that once the rainy seasons comes (which we all pray for, despite the challenges of mud) that the road can turn into a rutted, treacherous disaster. Especially for those of us at the very, very end of said road.

Then, there is the surprise of what condition my tent home and the community kitchen will be in.

The wild is unpredictable.

And so are humans.

Which means I never know what I’m going to find.

One live mouse sitting on a kitchen shelf happily munching on a large while lima bean

One bag of pancake mix with the corner nibbled and powder oozing out

One bowl full of dried and slowly rotting vegetables

Numerous shreds of Hershey Kiss wrappers, sans Kiss

Mouse turds decorating counters

One very greasy stovetop

Random stuff in fridge slowly fermenting

And most impressive:

One dead mouse drowned in a jar of opened honey on the shelf

Candles seem to be a favorite, with decorative teeth marks etched in the wax

Sponges

Soap

Weirdest was the nibbled edges of the coating on our stash of AA batteries

Damn, it is cute.

I told it so.

This mouse with huge dark eyes sat calmly looking at me from the third shelf, next to boxes of tea and mason jars. The lima bean in its mouth was bigger than his head, and bulged out like chipmunk cheeks on either side of its tiny whiskers and mouth.

“Friend!” I said to the mouse-friend. “You are so cute! Look at you! Good job with the bean that is bigger than your head! Just so you know you are going to be dead by the morning. No hard feelings, you just can’t live here. You can be anywhere else, but this kitchen is off limits to mice. Got it? You are so cute! You are going to be dead soon, enjoy that bean!”

As I cleaned the kitchen later I realized my contribution to our mouse residency: three small plastic packages of 15-bean soup I had left on the shelf earlier in the summer. I carefully pulled the bags out, one of which was only 2/3 full. Turns out mice love all 15 types of dried beans in 15-bean soup. Behind the beans was a deluxe mouse accommodation: a large nest of fluffy insulation. A super comfy bed and breakfast situation for our mouse friend.

After everything was cleaned and all possible mouse food was tossed or placed in plastic bins, I set the trap and went to bed. In the morning I said prayers over my now dead mouse friend, and tossed it up onto the roof to feed the ravens.

Cycle of life: Ravens finding mouse on roof, May 2026

I’ll spray the concoction someone left behind in a bottle labeled “peppermint oil for mice” in purple marker. I’ll set out mouse traps, baited with organic peanut butter. I’ll make sure everything nibbleable is stored in glass or hard plastic.

Then I’ll start crafting a check-out list for all guests of our community kitchen. I’m actually excited that we have reached a milestone of needing good, clear guidelines. This is part of the natural progression as you grow and expand and share with others: mindful agreements, named expectations, and loving boundaries.

For all the challenges of off-grid in the wild living, I so love coming home to the silence and peace of the mountains here. Some part of my soul unfurls in this expanse of sky and rocks and trees and stars. Whether I’m cleaning up mouse poop or standing with awe under the milky way, I’m grateful to be co-creating with nature and the humans at the end of a sometimes very muddy road.

A few fun facts about San Miguel county:

– Rural area: 99.8% (4,706 square miles)
– Urban area: 0.2% (10 square miles)
– Population density: 5.8 people / square mile

Next week we will be hosting our first silent retreat up on the land : )

Here are a few other online things coming up:

Saturday, September 5, 1 pm ET
Fierce Grace: Lessons from the Fire with Peggy Dylan and HeatherAsh

Sunday, September 6, 3 pm ET
New Moon Talk & Ceremony with HeatherAsh

Blessings!