The Final Shed

A snake is most aggressive during the final stages of shedding its skin. This is because its vision is severely impaired, and so in its moment of peak vulnerability, it becomes skittish and defensive. Girl, I get it.

We are in the final days of the Year of the Snake, which in Chinese astrology represents growth, transformation, and lived wisdom. Chinese/Lunar New Year happens on February 17th, which also plays host to an eclipse, so even if you’re not a glutton for astrology like me, you’re probably feeling it. The past month has not been smooth sailing for anyone, personally or collectively. I have definitely felt the extremes of intense vulnerability and reactivity, both of which seemed to come out of nowhere. So if that’s how you’ve been feeling… you’re not alone.

The snake has to find rough edges to rub up against in order to create a tear in the old skin so that it can break free from it. This sounds pretty fucking painful, which makes me feel like I must be doing something right, because lately I’ve experienced a sort of disorientation that has made me question everything. And maybe that’s what this time is for. We need the rough edges to help liberate us from the version of ourselves that we are growing out of.

Our scars live on the old skin, yet we cling to it. I’ve been asking myself what stories it’s time to let go of. You’re too much. You’re not enough. You will always be this. You will never be that. You must be perfect to be loved. I’ve taken stock of the wounds that I’m tired of protecting. I’ve felt around in the dark for a hand that wasn’t there and placed my own over my heart instead. And then I let myself just exist in the darkness.

I don’t really have a vision for what the new skin will look or feel like… all I know is that I’m releasing my loyalty to the old skin. It’s served its function. We are all ready, I think. And even if we aren’t, nature is taking its course with or without our consent. The best thing we can do for ourselves is get all the way on board, because otherwise the old skin will become a straitjacket. We will not be able to move, let alone grow.

I’m not ready, but I’m ready to be ready. I’m not shying away from the rough edges even if it hurts for the moment. I know it will be worth it. I hope that if you’re reading this, you’re embracing the pain of renewal, and that you’ll share your secrets with me for how to best do that. We’re all figuring this out together, but I am excited to see the dewy complexions of everyone who really did let the Year of the Snake shed the parts of them that were not meant to be carried forward.

Up next: the Year of the Fire Horse. What an absolutely fuck off punk rock image that is. This is one of many reasons why Chinese New Year > basic ass Gregorian new year. Let’s shed our shit so that we can be fully available for the wild ride that the horse has in store for us. <3