If your child has Ivy League dreams, they need to answer this question

A new report from Harvard’s Graduate School of Education details what universities are looking for in applicants now.

Recently, a student came to me, her college counselor, and told me she didn’t know how to answer a question on her application to an Ivy League university. This particular student was at the top of her class: she had taken every advanced course available to her and earned straight As, she had over a 1550 on the SAT, and she had awards and accolades lining her bedroom shelves. There weren’t many questions she couldn’t answer, but this one had stumped her: What brings you joy?

Colleges want good teammates, good friends, good citizens. Colleges want good humans. Our children’s lives need to revolve around more than academic achievements and goals. Instead, it means encouraging teenagers to develop an understanding of what they care about and “how those cares can connect to opportunities in the adult world.” Instead of just “achieving to achieve,” ask teenagers to think about what brings them fulfillment, what drives them, and what they value… in short, what brings them joy, and how they can continue to pursue that in college and in their careers.

Whether heading to college, pursuing a trade, or starting a career, the preparation is intense. Sports, extracurricular activities, test prep, school projects, visits, applications, and social dynamics have turned our once self-sufficient children into young adults who need us now more than ever. It’s as if we’re back in those early parenting days, but this time, the stakes are even higher. We got a bit complacent (ok – cocky), thinking we had everything under control, and this new phase hit us HARD. This led me and my husband to an important conversation—we were in desperate need of a second parental leave. It’s a full-time job — scheduling, driving, talking, and navigating the complexities of their lives.

Reduce stress with a clear plan for each semester (grades 9–12) to help your teen find colleges that are an academic, social, and financial fit.

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