Gonzo Report 149

Field notes from the crumbling American empire. Filed for the record on Thursday, May 7, 2026.

“If everybody always lies to you, the consequence is not that you believe the lies, but rather that nobody believes anything any longer. And a people that no longer can believe anything cannot make up its mind. It is deprived not only of its capacity to act but also of its capacity to think and to judge. And with such a people you can then do what you please.”
—Hannah Arendt

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There’s a reason ICE is so well-funded for the foreseeable future
Today the regime unveiled a domestic counterterrorism strategy—authorized under NSPM 7—formally classifying left-wing, anti-fascist, and “radically pro-transgender” ideologies as threats on par with al Qaeda and ISIS. White House terrorism czar Sebastian Gorka who has aligned himself, symbolically and politically, with Nazi‑aligned, virulently nationalist, antisemitic organizations—purposely designed the strategy to require no proof of violent intent, only ideological association—and promising “rapid neutralization” of “targets” which, to be clear, means any American citizen who Trump and his regime, and openly says so online or elsewhere. This is the blueprint for their purge—and it helps explain why ICE now has a budget bigger than many nations’ militaries.

DOJ asks Supreme Court to kill Carroll’s $83 million defamation verdict
The DOJ has asked the Supreme Court to let the federal government replace Trump as the defendant in E. Jean Carroll’s $83.3 million defamation case—a swap that would kill the lawsuit, since the government can’t be sued for defamation. A federal appeals court already blocked this move, ruling both Trump and the DOJ had forfeited the option by not raising it earlier, but the DOJ is betting the Supreme Court’s conservative supermajority will do what the lower courts wouldn’t. If they succeed, and the scumbag who lost in court and now uses the court to lose the loss, the federal government will have effectively laundered Trump’s $83.3 million personal liability for rape and defamation into oblivion.

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FBI opens investigation targeting reporter who wrote about Kash Patel’s alcoholism and dereliction of duty
The FBI has launched a criminal investigation against Sarah Fitzpatrick, the Atlantic journalist who reported that FBI Director Kash Patel has not only an alcohol problem, but a problem taking his role as head of the FBI seriously—and that is a problem for us all. Patel is using the FBI’s “insider threat unit,” which exists to hunt government employees who leak classified secrets. But there was nothing classified involved. Patel’s arroagance and incompetence have been on full display since day one. This is the type of investigation that authoritarian governments reach for when the courts refuse to criminalize journalists for doing their job—someone can’t be prosecuted for publishing the verifiable truth about a public official’s drinking problem, but they can be buried under federal subpoenas, and sources can be burned and (illegally) prosecuted, all while signaling to every other newsroom in the country that the same fate awaits others who dare to report on Patel (or any other member of the regime) and whatever questionable behaviors or character traits these bastards display behind the scenes.

Kennedy launches campaign to push Americans off antidepressants
HHS Secretary Bobby Brainworm unveiled a new federal plan to financially incentivize doctors to taper Americans off their antidepressant medications like Prozac and Zoloft, calling the legitimate use of these drugs—by one in six adults—a “dependency crisis.” Most Americans can’t afford therapy, so antidepressants from a primary care doctor are often the only treatment they can get. Kennedy is taking that away while offering nothing as replacement. I have to admit a part of me hopes they go through with it because I’m sick of these fascists and their bullshit. Get your torches and pitchforks ready just in case.

This concludes your report for Thursday, May 7, 2026.

Through gritted teeth,
–Zappa

Democracy dies in darkness and in the widening gap between what independent journalists make and what they need to keep the lights on.
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Photo credit: Bruno BD