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The Wandering Wonderer · Oct 10, 2025

Strip Mall Karate

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Erik Waag · The Wandering Wonderer

Hail Sword Swingers!

This time I ask you to put down that cold steel and master the discipline of Karate (as seen in who knows how many movies from the 80s).

Though I usually write with sword and sorcery in mind, this short story is a little different.

When I was a kid, my friends and I would pick up martial arts mags with our allowance money, and sit around wondering if we could order ninja suits, nunchucks, and the like without our parents noticing. We’d go over the articles and dream of Chuck Norris high kicks, Bruce Lee one inch punches, and badly dubbed death touches, and sometime practice on each other. What was a minor injury after all, in pursuit of cool things?

Strip Mall Karate

So here’s a tale recalling those kick-ass days. It was written as a weird tale with adults as the focus demographic, but after tucking it away for a while I realized it would be fine for kids (14+ is my best guess) so long as I took out some colorful 80s language.

Andy McKnight, the 80s kid in all of us, joins Kim’s Karate in search of freedom and purpose in his sleepy town. His brother calls it Bullshido, but there is something odd happening behind it all. A supernatural mystery that will change Andy forever.

Hit the button above for the Amazon link. It drops October 16th for $0.99.

And, if you like ridiculous, over-the-top book trailers in the form of an 80s TV ad, check it out HERE.

Cheers all.

KAIA!

-Erik

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Read the original on erikwaag.substack.com

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