Becoming a by-name regular somewhere. Did not know this would be the consignment store which is currently selling my parents’ record collection but it’s the best. The other day Sam and I walked in with a closet clean-out and our fave person there was like “Sam, we just got a giant mushroom-colored silk shirt in and I thought of you. I saved it for you to try on.” The thrill I got from this by proxy? Huge. Faves in PDX: Circle Round (<3), Vein of Gold, Deep Lake, Artifact.
Less calendared socializing, more spontaneous and low stakes “I’m-headed-to-this-bar-with-a-book-if-you-want-to-come-gab” vibes. Because it’s good practice in low-stakes saying no, and also because when it works out, it’s joy.
Relatedly…keeping a running list of things I’ve said no to (whether social hangs or professional things) at my desk. You will survive it!
One extraordinary evening wander at Tippet Rise, all thanks to the hospitality of River Arts and Books, a gem bookstore in tiny Roscoe, MT.
Don’t talk to me about aliens, talk to me about ARTISTS. And because I’d always rather be wandering, a treadmill walking pad beneath my desk…which correlates to my adult ADHD diagnosis that came in this year…both have helped me feel better even though I resisted the idea of each for years :)
Throwing monthly Write-a-thons with Emma Pattee where everybody donates $20+ to a chosen local nonprofit and we type silently in the back room of a brewery for two hours. We raised a few thousand dollars and wrote thousands of words and the vibes were very convivial. We slowed it down over the holidays but it will be back next year so HMU if interested in being on email list.
The servers said we were “very intimidating” lol. Splurging on really high-quality clothing basics, on sale/secondhand when possible: the 100% cotton sweatpants from MATE, the Jungmaven Disco Pants in dark denim, two insanely gorgeous yak-wool sweaters from Portland-based brand Tercette, and the cobalt blue Meals forager coat.
Pre-stocking kitchen with banger breakfast stuff like Lidey Heuck baked oatmeal (free recipe here), IYKYK granola, Joshua McFadden’s turmeric muesli (free recipe here), sweet potatoes roasted and served warm with a drizzle of tahini and cinnamon, and (most controversially, but personal fave) the Just-Egg inspired mung bean omelette.
Then again, sometimes you just need to wake up with dirtbag deadline quesadillas… Buying a secondhand Tivoli radio so that the jazz/classical music station can fill the house. Listener-supported-radio > > > algorithm music.
Speaking of music…my fave Substack I subscribed to this year was Jacqui Devaney’s Dinner Music. Every week, she curates a collection of music from different countries/decades that absolutely slaps. If “psychedelic folk music from an Australian nun in the 1970s” hits you the way it does me, consider subscribing.
Speaking of subscriptions….my fave new publication this year was The Approach, which arrives quarterly in the mail and is a “newspaper meets literary magazine meets underground organizing pamphlet focusing on how to approach––thwart, upend, sabotage, survive––autocracy.”
Re: reading…lots of wonderfully thought-provoking books this year but a few I keep talking to people about are The Night Trembles by Nadia Terranova, Marriage at Sea by Sophie Elmhurst, The Wilderness and The Anthropologists by Ayşegül Savaş, Stone Yard Devotional by Charlotte Wood, Girl on Girl by Sophie Gilbert, Paradise by Lizzie Johnson, Lathe of Heaven by Ursula LeGuin, and ideal lose-yourself audiobooks Consider Yourself Kissed by Jessica Stanley and Show Not Tell by Curtis Sittenfeld.
Lifting weights and using weight-machines in the gym. I feel stronger than I’ve felt in years and have successfully pushed through the quiet Instagram pressure to wear Cool Gym Clothes if I am a Gym Girl. The other day while wearing my giant Zohran shirt with old leggings I got into a 5-min conversation about socialism with a grandpa on the elliptical. 10/10
Planning the day so that whenever possible I can go outside to witness the sunset. This was easier when I was living on a beach in North Carolina but the habit has continued in PDX and so far it just feels nice!
Heated mattress pad, silk eye shade, silk bonnet, blackout curtains, blah blah blah.
Not being embarrassed about being a slow texter or using a lot of exclamation points!!! In general: embracing what makes you mediocre and (arguably) uncool.
Working up the courage to ask people to celebrate you. The book tour of 2023 really gave me good practice (I was always a very hesitant birthday-party-thrower) and getting married in September with a semi-last-minute-Sunday-evening-locals-only-soiree only continued that. Shout out to Priya Parker for reminding me that throwing a gathering is a gift to attendees, not an imposition.
No, I will not “AI-remove the cars behind us.” Coworking in hotel lobbies where you can tastefully sip the free coffee if you arrive early enough. But mostly: coworking in public libraries.
Bricking my phone to block social media for days at a time.
Splurging so as to always have one fancy NA bev in house: Casamara Club, Pathfinder, Dromme, Untitled Art beer…because sometimes at 5 p.m. you don’t want to drink but you do want to FEEL SOMETHING.
Duet-ing at my friend Zoe’s “minor talents” show (A+ holiday party idea).
First recital since 2004, baby! Learning how to roller-skate after watching this one seven-minute video???….motivated by receiving exquisitely painted skates as a wedding present from my sister.
Love watching Sam skate by in skates with my name on them <3 The fact that after writing a newsletter late last year about how I like doing errands with friends I got invited to do so many good ones this year….co-babysitting, co-grocery shopping, co-mending, co-going-to-the-fishtank-store, co-DIY-Christmas-present-ing…tysm friends.
Ever since I lived in Minneapolis I have been a Walker Art Museum member and the best part is that for $125 a year I split a membership with a friend ($62.5 each!) and we get free reciprocal access to literally hundreds of museums around the country.
Now I’m going to send this before I think of 100 more things that made me grin in this dark year.
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