the blackboard: april edition

April is doing its PNW thing.

The cherry blossoms are shaking confetti everywhere, the Bradford pears are in full wedding regalia, and my infernal wisteria that hasn’t bloomed in YEARS is starting to get leafy. I’ll eat my hat if it doesn’t give me some drippy, purple blossoms this year, but it’s been hateful for three years so I’m not holding my breathe. And speaking of breathe, the lilac trees have greened up and it’s only a matter of time before screen door season takes it’s rightful place just in time for me to let all the perfume of the outdoors in.

If you have been here in this little corner of the Substackosphere long enough, you know I’m a sucker for what I call “flux season.” It gives me hope to see the seasons change. Right as I’m feeling weary about what is happening in life, nature changes and reminds me that nothing is permanent. Not the good, not the bad, not the heat, or the cold. And all of it has it’s place and so do I.

So here’s what’s been on my mind and heart in the last month as winter’s mortal coil is being properly shaken:

FOCUS:
I’m starting to organize my summer and think through where I can make time to do things I often put on the back burner (working out, I’m looking at you). The fact that I have the brain space to even attempt to look forward and organize the months to come makes me feel incredibly grateful. This wasn’t always the case.

I’ve also been giving a fair amount of thought on how to carry grief that isn’t mine. I tend to feel the weight of other’s pain and take it on as my own—my problem to solve— and man, that’s just not it. But again, I have the forethought now that I can tell myself “this isn’t yours to carry—it is yours to pray about and walk alongside, as much as is possible in the season you’re in.” Having the discernment to know what I should carry and what I shouldn’t is the tricky bit. Prayer is all. Community is necessary. And I am thankful for both.

READING:
I finished Wild, Beautiful, and Free by Sophfronia Scott and it was delightful. Based on Jane Eyre but set in the Civil War South, it made me look at race, love, and how a place and a sense of home can have an otherworldly pull on a person. It’d be a worthy summertime read if you’re looking to add to your stack.

I listened to Daniel Nayeri’s Everything Sad is Untrue and it won the month for me. This book convinced me that I have to read more stories by immigrants. Taken from the perspective of adolescent Daniel and written by 35 year old Daniel, this poignant story of how his mother, sister, and him escaped a death order put on them in Iran and immigrated (after several years of being refugees in multiple countries) to Oklahoma. His stories are woven with truth and fiction, weaving the stories of his family and that of legendary Persians of old seamlessly. I laughed, I wept, and now I can’t recommend it highly enough.

Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow by Gabrielle Zevin was recommended to me via an Instagram influencer saying that “all creatives should read this book” and I’m not sure I’d say the same, but alas, I listened all the same. The novel follows two prodigal game designers and their producer friend through the ebbs and flows of friendship, love, and tragedy for the better part of three decades, starting in college. There were solid moments of thoughtful storytelling, but what I liked most about the novel (spoiler ahead) was one chapter from the perspective of a character in a coma. I’m not sure that this chapter was enough to carry the entire novel, (IMHO, it wasn’t) but the novel was a perspective I wouldn’t have picked up myself, so in that regard, I’m glad I gave it a listen.

Finally, I’m still picking at Wendell Berry’s Jayber Crow, not because I don’t enjoy it, but because I made it my bedtime book, and lately bedtimes have been later than usual and a lot of reading hasn’t happened. I read a chunk at lunch today and realized that I should be a tad more awake in order to fully appreciate the beauty of Berry’s narrative—lesson learned.

GOOD WORDS:
I’ve been re-listening to Andy Squyre’s “Miracle Service” album and dang it if the entire album is nothing but good words. He’s coming to Spokane April 26th to my church, so if you’re local, buy tickets. The event is “get a babysitter” worthy. Here’s the link.

Via Andy and Jon Guerra and their “Invisible Things” tour, I also discovered Delaney Young. She has the vocals of an angel and her songwriting is both rich and understated. Four of her songs made it onto my Lenten playlist, but “Yet” might be my favorite. You can sample her music here.

So let’s talk.

What mattering right now?

What are you reading?

What’s beautiful in your life?

Drop some good words below.