Emily IRL: Issue #01

Truth be told, there’s an actual human behind the writing here.

Writing is a challenging craft. Fulfilling, sure, but it demands energy, creative moodiness, and freedom from distraction. While I build out more of my platform and brand, I want a space that feels less dinner party, more group chat. A place where I can share what I’m doing, what I’m vibing with, and what I’m decidedly not—without all the polish.

Because like it or not, our environments and current realities shape our sexual experiences. How we feel about ourselves, how we show up for others, what we’re capable of holding.

The United States is a mess. The world is a mess. I find it hard to have hope, but I’m doing my damnedest trying to believe in it for the future. This space will be a blank canvas where I share tidbits of my life each week—the good, the bad, the fun, the tiresome.

Last September, I visited the Outer Banks for my mom’s 70th birthday. The trip was pre-planned before my dad passed, and no one was particularly thrilled about going. But on some level, we knew we needed to get away.

My creativity thrived there. That’s when I first got the idea for a self-isolation retreat.

So I booked a week for myself in Carova, North Carolina—a place only accessible via 4x4, extremely quiet, and exactly what I needed. Some people can’t imagine what they’d do at the beach in winter alone. But as soon as I shared my plans with my friends, they were like, “Yeah, that seems like an Emily thing for you to do.”

Like many, it takes me time to settle into a new environment. Towards the end of my week, I started craving more time. I had the privilege of being able to book another week, and it’s doing wonders for my nervous system.

Each morning I wake up and watch the sunrise. Is it below freezing most days? Yes. Do I look like a penguin waddling to the beach? Also yes. But being next to the ocean is calming in a way I can’t replicate anywhere else.

Watching the sunrise, listening to the waves crash, combing the shore for shells, and the dolphins—the dolphins! The dolphins have brought me so much joy. It’s like I’m that little girl who had a Lisa Frank lunchbox with a cartoon dolphin and saw a dolphin for the first time in real life.

I’ve definitely seen dolphins before, but I can’t remember the last time. It felt like a new beginning.

I’ve been working on my writing, getting clarity on what I want in my business, refining systems in the fence business so I have more time for “my” stuff. And, more importantly, rekindling my yoga practice and my relationship with my body-mind connection.

I’m so grateful I took the time for myself and had an opportunity to reconnect before the year really gets started. I likely will make this a tradition each year.

I exclusively read nonfiction, so if you’re a fiction girlie (guys, gays, and theys included), you can skip this section!

My reading ranges generally from education, history, and self-improvement. I’m one of those people who will continue to buy books even if I have six already sitting on (or under) my nightstand.

Before my retreat, I grabbed a book that has been staring me down: The Book of Alchemy: A Creative Practice for an Inspired Life by Suleika Jaouad. In fact, part of this writing resurgence was inspired by this book!

If you’re struggling to begin, or resistant to writing as a practice, it’s a digestible, approachable book filled with prompts to continue challenging your brain.

Part of me is like, “Duh, Emily. Of course writing comes easier and you feel better when you do it, even when you don’t want to.”

Okay, so if you read my latest article, you know I'm a longtime Hilary Duff fan. She was the queen of my adolescence and she's back! Her new music is dance-in-the-kitchen good, and the footage of her singing those old songs we all know and love is giving me permission to tune into that quirky little teen who adored her.

With Dry January coming to a close, here are my two go-to nonalcoholic wine recommendations. I’ve been sober since August 2024, and The Zero Proof has been instrumental in supporting my sobriety.

• Oddbird Blanc de Blancs Non-Alcoholic Sparkling White Wine: When I imbibed in alcohol, it was always champagne. I was sold on glitz, glamour, and luxury. This is the closest dupe I’ve found to the real thing, and I look forward to drinking it in my bubble baths. They even have mini ones, too, which are great if you don’t want to open an entire bottle.
  Purchase from Zero Proof for $24.99

  

• Saint Viviana Non-Alcoholic Sauvignon Blanc: Another Zero Proof find, this is the best NA sauvignon blanc dupe I’ve found, AND it has a screw-top (like, the wine equivalent of a dress with pockets).
  Purchase from Zero Proof for $14.99

These links aren't sponsored, and I don't earn anything from them. I think The Zero Proof is a great brand and I'm consistently impressed by their offerings and customer service. Give them a try!

Okay, that’s all I’ve got for this edition of Emily IRL. Now begins the daunting task of packing my belongings to head home to what could be 12-20 inches of snow. Eek! Stay tuned.