The Difference Between Deciding and Convincing Yourself

Deciding is quiet. Convincing yourself is exhausting.

Do you want to keep tiring yourself out?

When you’ve actually decided, there isn’t much left to do. You don’t keep reassessing the idea every fifteen minutes to see if your circumstances have changed. You simply move through life from that point of view no matter how annoying the ego of not having it is.

Convincing yourself feels completely different. Most people can probably relate because most of us have been here. It can be super loud and repetitive.

It’s constantly trying to overpower every doubt with another affirmation, another visualization, another YouTube video, another “one more thing” that will finally make it click. It tries to keep you in the identity you have been in for a while. The one who thinks you don’t have it and need to do more to “get” it.

And you keep giving in!!!

You’re not living from the identity because you keep trying to argue yourself into it.

The identity that isn’t experiencing what you want is always going to need convincing that it is. Because once you actually step into the identity of having, that’s a completely different identity.

Listen again.

The identity that isn’t experiencing what you want will never be the identity that experiences what you want. Because those are two different identities. The identity that is lacking what you want will always need convinced because it will never be the identity that has it.

You can even think of them as three different identities if you want.

The identity that doesn’t have it, the identity that doesn’t have it and wants it, and the identity that has it.

The “has it” is referring to within the experience because you’re never actually getting anything.

This means you are never going to be able to convince the identity that doesn’t have it but once it that it actually has it. At that point, you will have shifted identities.

What else does this mean? It means that if you are trying to convince yourself, you are entertaining the identity that doesn’t have it.

Does the identity that already has it need convincing that it already has it? Do you need to be convinced on what hair color you have or what color shirt you have on? I hope not.

The version of you who already has what you want isn’t spending all day convincing themselves they have it. They already decided. That’s why they aren’t looking for evidence every five minutes.

A real decision doesn’t look to thoughts, 3d experiences, and emotions for confirmation. It doesn’t wait until your body feels calm or until you “fully believe.”

If you’re still asking yourself, “Do I believe it yet?” every few hours…

You’re probably not deciding.