Call Update

Dear Dr. Laura, My husband and I called your program about two years ago. He was all over me when we were dating, but after we got married, that came to a halt. We were hardly ever intimate because he just didn’t feel like it, and he would even turn me down.

You told him, “That isn’t very loving.”

It was a shot straight to his heart. He prides himself on being the best husband, father, and provider he can be, and you helped him realize just how important this part of our marriage was.

A few months later, there was a day I almost said no to him. I came home exhausted, stressed, and completely drained. He suggested we take a shower together. I really didn’t want to—I just wanted to put on comfortable clothes and fall asleep. He was gently insistent, but I couldn’t tell whether I didn’t want to because I was tired or because I was subconsciously trying to “get back” at him. That second thought terrified me. How could I have the nerve to say no when he was genuinely making such an effort?

After we put the kids to bed, we got in the shower together. It was exactly what we both needed. We’ve been on a roll ever since.

We celebrated our 15th wedding anniversary this year and spent five days away together close to home. I packed exactly one shirt and one pair of pants—to wear to and from our destination.

The quality of our intimacy has grown into true lovemaking. It’s the best it has ever been. I’ve found that I feel fulfilled for much longer now. Quality over quantity.

This week, he told me he was bragging to a coworker about how lucky he is. He said he has two incredibly sweet and thoughtful children, and a wife who can’t wait for him to come home and who falls asleep on him every night he’s there.

Thank you for helping turn my amazing, caring, thoughtful husband—the one I couldn’t get enough of—into my amazing, caring, thoughtful husband who can’t get enough of me.

Sincerely,

A Listener

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