you're not going to meet them on your couch

Hello hot people- if you are receiving this, it is because you signed up for/attended a Drinks First event. If you’re lucky, I send this out once a month (it’s usually less lol)… Give me a chance before you choose to unsubscribe, and if you do- I’d love to know why you hate me and want to see me fail xx <3 p.s. you can pay to support my work (aka health insurance) xx

Ok I’ve been holding this one in for a while and I’m so excited to finally tell you…

We’re doing a retreat. 20 singles for a weekend of debauchery.

May 1–3 · Gatherwild Ranch · Germantown, NY

20 people. A full weekend upstate. Private chef dinners, cocktail hours, a bonfire, yoga, a botanical walk + amaro infusion class, mixology class, sauna, cold plunge, paddleboarding, hiking, biking, and a white party Saturday night. All lodging, food, drinks, and programming included.

This is the thing I’ve been wanting to build since I started Drinks First. Not just another bar night with 200 people- but an intimate, curated weekend where you actually get to know people. Where you’re doing things together, not just standing in a circle holding a vodka soda trying to think of something to say.

The whole weekend is designed around shared experiences- which, if you read the rest of this newsletter, you’ll know I believe is the future of how people connect. Whether you come solo or bring a friend, you’re going to leave with real relationships. I’m confident in that because I’ve seen it happen at every single one of our events, and this is the most intentional version of that we’ve ever created.

$995 solo · $1,850 per pair

APPLICATIONS CLOSE APRIL 19TH OR EARLIER IF WE FILL SPOTS. ACCEPTING ON A ROLLING BASIS.

Only 20 spots. This is application-based because I want the right energy in the room.

Learn More/Apply

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately- the way people talk about wanting to meet someone versus what they’re actually doing about it.

Every week someone tells me some version of the same thing: “I’m so tired of apps.” “I never meet anyone.” “NYC dating is dead.” And I get it, I really do, I’ve been there. I’m literally in the business of solving this problem and I feel the same frustrations.

But here’s what I’ve noticed after running Drinks First events for years, hosting the podcast, and talking to thousands of single people in this city- the people who actually meet someone are never the ones who optimized their Hinge profile or swiped for an extra 20 minutes before bed. They’re the ones who said yes to something.

Not “yes” in a vague manifestation way. Like literally yes to the random plan, the weird invite, the thing that required them to get off the couch and be a little uncomfortable.

And I think the reason is simpler than people want to admit: it’s 10x harder to build chemistry sitting across from a stranger asking “so what do you do?” Chemistry comes from doing things together. It comes from shared experiences- from the tennis lesson where you’re both terrible at it, from the cold plunge where you’re screaming, from the one too many martinis you had in the corner of Temple Bar.

I’m not the first person to say this but I think I see it more clearly than most because I literally watch it happen in real time. At our events- the people who connect the deepest are never the ones who are scanning the room for “who is my type” and waiting to be approached. They’re the ones being actively engaged, going up to people and participating in whatever activity is there.

The dating app model trained an entire generation to think that meeting someone is a search problem (check out this new “fair match calculator”). Filter by height, age, neighborhood, vibe. Find the right person, then go on a date to confirm. But that’s not how it works. Attraction isn’t a checklist. It’s a feeling that emerges when you’re in the right environment, doing something that brings out the best version of yourself, surrounded by people who are doing the same.

That’s why I think the future of dating isn’t an app. It’s not even a bar night. It’s experiences. Supper clubs, workout classes, random birthday parties, group travel- things that give you a reason to talk to someone beyond “hey, I like your prompt.” The shared experience IS the icebreaker. It removes the pressure of “is this a date?” and replaces it with “are we having fun?” And from that- real things grow.

I know this because I’ve watched it happen hundreds of times. People who came to a Drinks First event alone and left with someone’s number. People who said yes to the rogue experience. People who told me they hadn’t been excited about meeting someone in years and then something shifted because they put themselves in a room with intention.

So if you’re reading this from your couch, swiping through the same faces, wondering why nothing is clicking- I want you to consider that the problem isn’t the apps. It’s not NYC. It’s not that “everyone is emotionally unavailable” or whatever we’re telling ourselves this week. The problem might just be that you haven’t given yourself the chance to connect with someone while actually living your life.

The best date you’ll ever go on isn’t a date. It’s a random Saturday where you said yes to something.

Get off the couch. I’ll see you out there.

things I actually care to push because I genuinely like them.

*I may make some commission if you use my link/code*

MYODETOX

I have gone through quite a few injuries in my lifetime- including tearing my ACL earlier this year. I opted not to get surgery, and instead have gone a holistic route. What does this mean- I have gone through months of PT, massage, chiro, acupuncture, contrast therapy, etc. And the best PT/Chiro I have experiences has been at MYODetox. They believe in “Future Proofing” your body. I can’t tell you it’s cheap, but if you are suffering or looking to improve- I can’t recommend it enough.

Use my code ARIANA50 for $50 off here.

MEALPAL

I literally eat lunch out everyday and MealPal has made it so easy for me to eat healthy and for way less money (also I get to try new places!)

Here is my referral

OTHERSHIP

You may already know how much we love Othership.

• Use code “DRINKSFIRST” for a 15% discount

• A SPECIAL DRINKS FIRST MEMBERSHIP (2x a month for $84)

• For first timers: a 2-for-1 special

BLADE

The other day I saw it cost over $300 to get to JFK in the rain. Skip all that- take a BLADE helicopter - use code “ARIANA” for $50 off.

THERAPIE

Therapie Clinic for Med Spa Needs (I go for Laser Hair Removal): Code- ARIANA10 and use this link to check out other offers!

OPEN

I am NOT a woo woo wellness girly but I’mm so bought in to Open. I did a breath and sound class @op_e___n in Santa Monica / Venice in Los Angeles and it took me on a JOURNEY!

If you cant make it to their studio- im truly obsessed with their app. use my code ARIANAOPEN30 for a free 30 day trial.

KINDRED

So many people ask how I travel so much. The answer is Kindred- a members only home swapping app. If you have your own place, I highly recommended checking it out. I know it cant be nerve wrecking to host someone in your place- so use my code “ARI.NAT” for expedited review and 5 free credits.

FORA

I went on a side quest to become a travel agent earlier this year, now I do all my (and my close friends vacation bookings). It costs nothing to use a travel agent, and you get the best rates and perks. If you have something you want to book- email ariana.nathani@fora.travel or if you’re interested in the industry, check out Fora using my link ($50 off your membership).

SPENCER’S SPA

This chic as hell spa in SoHo is one of the best resets you can do for yourself. I loved the 60 min facial and the massages always hit. Try it for yourself- use code DRINKSFIRST for $50 off.

Now… enough of all that serious talk. Paid subs- Time for my rapid fire recs:

These are the things, places, etc. I’m loving right now.

<3 That’s all for you freeloaders xx

Get outside people