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Hello hot people- if you are receiving this, it is because you signed up for/attended a Drinks First event. If you’re lucky, I send this out once a month (it’s usually less lol)… Give me a chance before you choose to unsubscribe, and if you do- I’d love to know why you hate me and want to see me fail xx <3 p.s. you can pay to support my work (aka health insurance) xx
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PARTY IN A TENNIS BUBBLE 🎾 — TOMORROW (THURS) NIGHT - JULY 30
Thursday, July 30th. 9:30pm–12am. Advantage Tennis, Hell’s Kitchen. This is Spark Session #6, which means we’ve been doing this for awhile.
Open bar (wine, beer, cider, the non-negotiables). All three skill levels, self-identify at check-in, gear provided if you need it (bring your own if you’re precious about your racquet, no judgment). At least 40 minutes of drills with a pro, up to 30 minutes of free play, a court with LVBL, and one court just for hanging at the bar if you’d rather watch than sweat.
Check-in starts at 9. Courts open at 9:30 sharp.
I’ve worked with a lot of the biggest dating apps in the game, and I’ve been a user of most of them too. A year ago I wrote about the “dating app renaissance,” a batch of scrappy little apps trying to fix the swipe-and-ghost pipeline by putting your actual friends into the loop instead of a stranger’s algorithm. At the time it felt like a fringe experiment, but twelve months later it’s not. It is the entire industry- there is more venture money chasing “fix dating” right now.
Here’s some worth mentioning:
Overtone — Justin McLeod, the guy who built Hinge, left to build a new one. No feed, no swiping, an AI voice interview introduces you to someone. Match Group is an investor.
Known — Celeste Amadon (stanford drop out) raised over $10 million for a voice-based AI matchmaker that skips the profile grid entirely (Only SF based right now)
Amata — same genre, NYC focused. An AI plays matchmaker instead of handing you a stack of photos to judge.
Breeze — no chat function, at all. You match, the app books the date, you don’t talk until a couple hours before. Bold move. Also, per its own reviews, apparently a lot of people just don’t show up.
Rivet — your friends do the vetting, dating gamified with AI avatars. Matches come with a friend-of-a-friend seal of approval instead of a compatibility percentage.
Timeleft — dinners for strangers, no app-brain required, just show up. They’re running something like 6,500 of these a week across 200+ cities, which is a genuinely huge number for something that started as “let’s put six strangers at a table and see what happens.”
222 and Matchbox — group-first, event-first, similar bones to Timeleft. Less about matching two people to each other, more about matching people into a room and letting the room do the work.
Tinder Events — the incumbent’s answer to all of the above (though bumble has been doing events for ages). Ran 60+ events in LA this spring, pulled in two thirds of its eligible active users to at least one (apparently). Now expanding to nine new cities. New York is one of them (we were approached, and said no… for right now)
That is a lot of money and a lot of engineering hours pointed at the exact same problem: people don’t want to swipe anymore (DUH THANK YOU CAPTAIN OBVIOUS)
Here’s the part that took me longer to piece together, and I think it’s the actual story. Look at who’s currently winning and who isn’t. Grindr is public, fully independent, not owned by Match, and it is gaining market share right now while Match and Bumble both lose paying users, specifically because it never tried to be for everyone. Feeld’s the same story, independent, growing, never chasing mass market. None of these apps ever tried to be everyone’s app, and staying small and specific is exactly why they’re still standing on their own (for now).
Now look at the other lane. Sniffies built a real niche, got good at it, and Match showed up with $100 million and an option to buy the rest later. Hinge is the closest thing to a counterexample, a genuinely general app that broke through on its own merit, and Match backed it in 2017 and fully owned it by 2018. It didn’t get a full year as an independent success story before it got folded in.
So here’s the actual pattern: nobody, and I mean nobody, has built a general, mass-market, standalone dating app success story and kept it standalone. Your options right now are get specific and stay small, or get good and get bought. There is no third lane where you serve everyone and remain your own company. I don’t think that’s an accident and I don’t think it’s temporary.
Which is what makes the current funding wave interesting to actually sit with. Bumble’s stock is down something like 90% from its IPO peak. Match’s own growth has been flat to declining for a couple of years. The going wisdom for a while was that dating apps were a tired, saturated category nobody wanted to fund anymore. And then, in the last several months alone: $10 million-plus into Known, pre-seed into Overtone, $100 million into Sniffies. The category is back and investors are reinvigorated. But nobody’s writing those checks to build the next general-market winner, because that lane doesn’t produce winners anymore (at least not yet).
And this is where the Match Group of it all stops being a side note and becomes the whole plot. They own Tinder, Hinge, OkCupid, Match.com, Meetic, Plenty of Fish, The League, Azar, and Her. Bought OkCupid in 2011, Hinge in 2018, Plenty of Fish and Pairs in 2015. Now they’re an investor in Overtone, the app that’s supposedly coming to kill the swipe model, while also building Tinder Events in-house off the same balance sheet. That’s not hedging, that’s owning both sides of the table and getting paid no matter who wins. Bumble is the only real company left standing outside that umbrella, and even that might not last, there were reports last month that Bumble is exploring a sale (allegedly), all while touting their new structure “Bee” which is… you guessed it… an AI matchmaker. But if it happens, there’s functionally one company that owns the entire relationship economy in America. That’s not a metaphor. That’s a monopoly, and it should worry you more than whichever app has the nicest onboarding flow this month.
Here’s the thing underneath all of it, the reason none of this ever quite lands no matter how good the AI gets. Connection isn’t a product. It’s an outcome. Every era of dating tech has sold connection as the pitch while actually selling something narrower: access, probability, a metered shot at the thing. Match.com charged you per message. Tinder sells an engagement-optimized feed that needs you to keep opening it. Known and Overtone are selling a subscription to an AI’s opinion of who you should meet next. None of them have ever actually sold you connection, because connection isn’t a product, it’s an outcome, and outcomes don’t have a very good subscription model.
I don’t think the renaissance is over, it may have just begun, and I don’t think any of the apps above are wrong to try. But if you’re waiting on one of them to actually fix this, you’ll be waiting a while. They’re all selling you the same appointment with a slightly different receptionist, and the guy writing half the checks is the same guy who broke it in the first place.
It’s a tennis summer
We’ve been keeping lowkey- but playing tennis. These events are a hit, it’s hard to explain but if you haven’t been to one we highly recommend coming, all levels welcome
things I actually care to push because I genuinely like them.
*I may make some commission if you use my link/code*
KINDRED
I’m part of Kindred’s member board for female travelers, and I have to say it has changed my life. Kindred is a home-swapping network where members earn credits by hosting others, so travel gets more affordable with no money changing hands. They just launched a Women Travelers Circle built specifically for women who want to travel more and connect with hosts they trust.
I know it cant be nerve wrecking to host someone in your place- but I specifically have only hosted women that I have approved, and have had nothing but great experiences.
FOR ANYONE:
Use my code “ARI.NAT” for expedited review and 5 free credits.
FOR WOMEN:
Use this link for expedited review into both kindred, and the women’s travel circle (+ 5 free credits!)
MYODETOX
I have gone through quite a few injuries in my lifetime- including tearing my ACL earlier this year. I opted not to get surgery, and instead have gone a holistic route. What does this mean- I have gone through months of PT, massage, chiro, acupuncture, contrast therapy, etc. And the best PT/Chiro I have experiences has been at MYODetox. They believe in “Future Proofing” your body. I can’t tell you it’s cheap, but if you are suffering or looking to improve- I can’t recommend it enough.
Use my code ARIANA50 for $50 off here.
MEALPAL
I literally eat lunch out everyday and MealPal has made it so easy for me to eat healthy and for way less money (also I get to try new places!)
Here is my referral
OTHERSHIP
You may already know how much we love Othership.
Use code “DRINKSFIRST” for a 15% discount
A SPECIAL DRINKS FIRST MEMBERSHIP (2x a month for $84)
For first timers: a 2-for-1 special
BLADE
The other day I saw it cost over $300 to get to JFK in the rain. Skip all that- take a BLADE helicopter - use code “ARIANA” for $50 off.
THERAPIE
Therapie Clinic for Med Spa Needs (I go for Laser Hair Removal): Code- ARIANA10 and use this link to check out other offers!
OPEN
I am NOT a woo woo wellness girly but I’mm so bought in to Open. I did a breath and sound class @op_e___n in Santa Monica / Venice in Los Angeles and it took me on a JOURNEY!
If you cant make it to their studio- im truly obsessed with their app. use my code ARIANAOPEN30 for a free 30 day trial.
FORA
I went on a side quest to become a travel agent earlier this year, now I do all my (and my close friends vacation bookings). It costs nothing to use a travel agent, and you get the best rates and perks. If you have something you want to book- email ariana.nathani@fora.travel or if you’re interested in the industry, check out Fora using my link ($50 off your membership).
SPENCER’S SPA
This chic as hell spa in SoHo is one of the best resets you can do for yourself. I loved the 60 min facial and the massages always hit. Try it for yourself- use code DRINKSFIRST for $50 off.
Now… enough of all that serious talk. Paid subs- Time for my rapid fire recs:
These are the things, places, etc. I’m loving right now. As well as my south of france itinerary
SHOPMY
Just my favorite products (travel, beauty, etc.)
<3 That’s all for you freeloaders xx
Now… enough of all that serious talk. Paid subs- Time for my rapid fire recs:
These are the things, places, etc. I’m loving right now.
Date Night:
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