"Why Didn't You Protect Me?": When Children Blame Protective Mothers

Dr Elizabeth Dalgarno is a lecturer and researcher in women and children’s health and justice at the University of Manchester, UK, and the founder and director of the global SHERA Research Group. She is a world-leading academic expert in her core area of research - how coercive control and post-separation abuse, especially in the family courts, impacts women and children.

Elizabeth specialises in the harms caused by institutions and male-perpetrated abuse, as well as the safety, protection and recovery of mothers and children. All posts contain content you may find upsetting - resources for support are available here.

I’ve worked with protective parents over many years (largely mothers), and they repeatedly tell me that there are few things as painful to hear from their children as the sentence:

“Why didn’t you protect me?”