Everyone is alive, everything is well

“There is a brief moment in your life where everyone important around you is alive and, hopefully, doing well. Cherish this moment.” I read this once in an article several years ago, but I was too young to understand and realize what this truly means. I guess it’s time I acknowledge that I find myself in this situation now, and I am beyond grateful for it.

In the last couple of years I found myself in a loop of short travel bursts back home for the weekend. Main reason, just like any other eastern European, is to go for dental or medical checks, get some documents done, or any other task that is either (1) cheaper in the east, or (2) requires your presence. While on the facade that is true in my case as well, I’ve also prioritized seeing my parents, grandparents, and extended family with this occasion.

When I was a small kid, life seemed so slow. My grandmas were young and full of energy, cooking whichever meals me and my cousins wanted to eat. Starting with their signature plǎcinte and zeamǎ, and finishing with our “modern” requests of nuggets and pizza. I can still feel that eggy, soft dough with vertically cut salami on top. They would call for us while we were playing in mǎhalǎ (tr. neighborhood) with our friends, and lunch was unskippable. Leaving out food on the plate at the end meant “you’re leaving your energy here”, so of course we had to eat everything in order to have more energy to play!

My grandpas were firm and strong, one a born-driver who’s dedicated his whole life to logistics, and another working on the production floor & heating industry. Their silent but reassuring demeanor made them look so grounded even in the most difficult phases of their lives. With one I was driving cars as big as some houses, taking the wildest routes in the countryside, while with the other I was inspecting the local district heating plant (or kotelnyaia).

Now, having entered this stage of adulthood, I see or hear them less and less. Sometimes life just happens & you start prioritizing other things. Studies, career, relationships, and your own life adventures. Coming back home I see how their health declines, and the grandparents I once knew and spent my childhood with, are looking different. On the phone, they say “all is well, we’re holding on.” In person, I see their struggles, and this pains me a lot. Those hands, arched backs, and bulky glasses…

However, I’m still very blessed to have them around, and get the chance to talk to them about my life, ups & downs, and other interesting common topics. Moreover, in February and July we had the chance to celebrate both my grandmas’ birthdays, and I’m lucky to have made it home as well for that. Being there, hugging them, and celebrating together is an irreplaceable feeling that not everyone gets the chance to have, so I’m very grateful for it.

You might have experienced that shock when you were small when your grandparents from both sides of the family were in the same room. Even today I get the same feeling!

Yesterday, I woke up in the bed I spent most my summers (and winter holidays) in was and it was such a nostalgic feeling. I realized that clinging on to the past does no good, and instead, I should turn to the present and cherish the beautiful remaining moments we have together. Even if we see each other for shorter than a day, we all feel so fulfilled.

Life goes on, and new generations in our family are already here. For me, they are my bunica and bunelul (tr. grandma & grandpa), but for somebody else they are mǎmuca and tǎtuca (tr. grand-grandparents). Seeing them interacting together despite the stark age difference was such an endearing feeling. That is when it came to my mind: “everyone is alive, everything is well.”

A promise I made to myself is to try my best to visit them as often as possible, and when life becomes chaotic again, I will try to share updates and hear their voice. And to turn this into an exercise, if your grandparents are still around and you can, this is a sign for you to call them :)