chemical dependency

Today, I threw away the anti-depressants I'd held onto "for a rainy day".

I don't need them any more.

Last time I took them was as a stupid, painful show of how fucked-up I was while my relationship with my erstwhile wife was falling apart.

Haven't needed them in years, and it's stupid to keep a box of drugs about for a meltdown that isn't going to happen.

I've not been that kind of depressed since, well, pretty much since she left.

So instead of keeping them for a rainy day, I put them in the bin.

It's been a long, long time since I needed anti-depressants and keeping them around like some kind of keepsake is stupid and weird.

I've been doing OK for about three years now. Since she went away, I got my head back together.

I don't need a clutch of drugs for some time I'll lose myself again. I haven't lost myself since I got better after her.

I haven't needed that for years, now. I found myself a life that I enjoy and I don't need to have a bag of happy pills in the box 'just in case'.

And that's pretty cool.

I am Scott DeathBoy. I don't need anti-depressants to sort my head out, I'm pretty well-balanced, now.

And that's pretty cool.