Separating Worth from Praise

Everything that’s valuable in this world can’t be immediately quantified by getting praised or paid for it. Speaking from experience, I know it’s easy to internalize societal pressures that tell us the opposite. But carving out space in our lives for value systems that transcend shortsighted metrics is one of the most important things we can do as human beings.

I like the way that Marcus Aurelius describes the intrinsic worth of things in his Meditations.

Everything which is in any way beautiful is beautiful in itself, and terminates in itself, not having praise as part of itself. Neither worse then nor better is a thing made by being praised. I affirm this also of the things which are called beautiful by the vulgar, for example, material things and works of art. That which is really beautiful has no need of anything; not more than law, not more than truth, not more than benevolence or modesty. Which of these things is beautiful because it is praised, or spoiled by being blamed? Is such a thing as an emerald made worse than it was, if it is not praised? Or gold, ivory, purple, a lyre, a little knife, a flower, a shrub?

All of us have heard the story of some brilliant artist who toiled away in obscurity until their work received recognition later in life or after death. Nothing in the work itself changed except for an award or haphazard virality. Of course, this only applies to the artists we ended up hearing about.

What’s the point of doing something that doesn’t win attention? Once again, I’ll return to the Meditations.

What then is worth being valued? To be received with clapping of hands? No. Neither must we value the clapping of tongues, for the praise which comes from the many is a clapping of tongues. Suppose then that thou hast given up this worthless thing called fame, what remains that is worth valuing?

What remains? As a Stoic philosopher, Marcus Aurelius would argue that we should attain virtue and live a life that’s consistent with our human nature.

I don’t disagree. However, it must be nice to be a Roman emperor who can contemplate the meaning of the life and never worry about making a living.

For the rest of us who must sell our labor in order to survive, renumeration still matters. There’s always a price in the real world. You want your boss to notice the effort you put in so that you can get a promotion or raise. You’d prefer that the sexism or racism in your industry not cause others to belittle you. If you take your resumé or social capital to the labor market, you’ll find that these are given a price. Content creators can see follower counts.

Even if you don’t care about money or online visibility, you might be the type of person who really wants your partner to praise you for washing the dishes and holding down domestic duties. You’d like your children, when they are of age, to acknowledge all of your sacrifices. Or maybe you are a volunteer in the community who wants to serve others but would also fancy receiving a plaque for civic engagement.

The world is full of markets that render some kind of valuation. There are people whose adoration we crave. That’s a given. The mistake is to read these externals too literally and judge our lives according.

Marcus Aurelius, along with other Stoics, would argue that there is something intrinsically fruitful about virtuous acts, about pursuing what is true, good, and beautiful apart from praise. Scientists might point out that intrinsic motivation, or doing things for their own sake, is correlated with enhanced learning, performance, creativity, and psychological wellness.

Those who believe in God might say that even when others are unable to see the value of what you do or who you are, God sees you. There’s a spiritual order to the universe in which your acts and very being shine brightly.

We walk in a world whizzing with acclamations, but our flourishing depends on cultivating layers to our lives that aren’t dependent on the noise.