Welcome to the Dad Starting Over podcast! "Starting Over" means different things to different people. It could be that you're newly divorced and starting over fresh with a new life. It could be that you're still married and wanting to hit the reset button and finally do things right within your marriage. Whatever your story may be, you're in the right place. I'm Ralph, a.k.a DSO, the author of books including "The Dead Bedroom Fix", "Divorce Panic", "Real Talk" "Red Flags" and "REBUILD: The…
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He told himself the same thing for eleven years. Just hold on until the kids are grown, then we'll reconnect. The empty nest came. Nothing changed. In this one I read a real email from a 58-year-old man sitting in a silent house, asking if it's too late and whether he wasted his window. Then I walk through the final talk. When to have it, how to have it from a place of strength, and why "waiting…
New series, new co-host. Cassie (https://x.com/FutureDrSassy) is an occupational therapist, a researcher, and a certified pelvic floor therapist — and starting now, she and I are going to have the conversations about sex and intimacy that nobody had with any of us growing up. This first one starts where all of it starts: childhood. What you watched your parents do — the hand-holding, the date…
His wife said it five or six times over the course of a year. "If you need it that bad, just go find it somewhere else." He sat her down one night and asked her to confirm it. She did. Twice. A few weeks later he had one phone call with an old friend from college. Ninety minutes. No flirting. Nothing physical. She was going through her own divorce and needed someone to talk to. A few days later,…
Alison Armstrong has been studying men since 1991, when she caught herself bringing out the worst in them and assuming that's who men really were. Thirty-five years later, she's the author of The Queen's Code, the creator of the Understanding Men and Understanding Women courses, and most of her work is teaching WOMEN to stop emasculating men. This week she sat down with a channel full of guys…
He stopped initiating six months ago. He told himself it was a test. He waited for her to notice. She never did. In this episode I break down what's actually going on when a husband quietly withdraws from his sexless marriage and his wife doesn't react. Spoiler: it's not what most guys think. It's not her being checked out for a week. It's data. And the data is loud. We cover: The quiet test most…
What if she already loves you as much as she is capable of loving anybody? And it's still not enough for you. Not because she's cruel. Not because she's punishing you. Not because there's a switch you haven't found yet. The tank just isn't that big. I had an attachment expert named Cassie on my live stream, and she told me a story I haven't been able to shake. She'd been with an avoidant man who…
A full hour LIVE with therapist and author Laura How — one of the very few women publicly saying what she says about sexless marriages. So few, in fact, that the wives in her own village have stopped saying hello. We covered a lot of ground: whether you should stay when the in-love feelings fade, why "I fell out of love" is usually an ego defense, what attachment dysfunction actually is (hint:…
He came home early from a work trip. Didn't text ahead. Walked in and found out the truth. His wife doesn't have a desire problem. The desire works fine. He's just not part of it. Derek wrote me after sitting in his car for twenty minutes trying to figure out what to do with what he just found out. In this episode I break down what's actually going on — why the vibrator isn't about preference,…
Here is a recording of impromptu live stream I recently did. No script, no agenda, just me and the chat. And as usual, the unscheduled ones end up being the best ones. This stream turned into a full clinic on the stuff I hear from men every single day: the guy who told his wife he desired her and got nothing back. The guy 10 years into a sexless marriage who swears he "shouldn't have to" bring it…
A man divorces his wife after two years of zero affection post-menopause. He starts dating again, shares his story with a woman he's seeing, and she calls him a narcissist. His ex-wife used the same word. Now he's writing to me wondering if they're right. In this episode, I break down what actual narcissism is, why the word has become a go-to weapon in relationship conflict, and how to think…
