At a Glance: End-of-life care is more than medical treatment. Hospice and death doulas provide different forms of support that work together to care for the whole person. Planning ahead eases the burden on loved ones, encourages meaningful conversations, and helps people make informed choices about how they want to live and be cared for. • Hospice and death doulas provide complementary care, not…
Sherbert follows both Oren and me from room to room. He waits outside the bathroom door. He knows the sound of our car pulling into the driveway before anyone else. He has his own spot on the bed (usually on top of my husband, Oren, who is allergic to cats) and his own routine that demands our attention throughout the day. Point Arena Lighthouse - The most pet-friendly place we've stayed. Okay -…
A practical guide to questioning charges, spotting errors, and lowering healthcare costs Picture this: you finally schedule that routine procedure everyone over 50 gets reminded about constantly. You do the prep, take the day off work, get through the procedure, and move on with your life, assuming everything went according to plan. Then the bills start arriving: one from the facility, another…
My husband, Oren, is a videographer. And one of the things we love doing is creating life review videos for people who want to capture their stories. It’s always interesting to watch what happens. At first, people think it’s just about recording a few memories. A few stories, maybe some photos. And then the whole family gets involved. People jump in. Stories come out that no one’s heard in years.…
When most of us think about end-of-life planning, we often think about paperwork. It’s “easy” and feels like something we can organize and check off. But in truth, we can fill out every form and still leave people guessing. Because most of what happens as we get older isn’t covered in these checklists. These documents matter, but they only capture a small part of the picture. And medical decisions…
Most of us grow up learning how to love people. Very few of us are taught what to do after they die. Many of you know my family lost my cousin Heather to suicide. Every year on her birthday, I light a candle and hold a conversation with her. Last year, she would have turned 50, and the loss felt much more raw and painful. I thought about all the times we joked when we were younger; how we’d grow…
Oren, my husband, and I have had this discussion more than once. When we first talked about it, it felt like something out of science fiction. We’ve been married for over 20 years, and back then, the idea that you could somehow keep talking to someone after they died, through technology, felt far off. Almost unrealistic. But now, reality is starting to catch up. The conversation started with a…
One of the biggest surprises I see with the families I work with is how they picture hospice. They think help will be there 24/7, that everything will be covered, and that they’ll be in a supporting role. They expect someone to be there to care for their loved one while they focus on being emotionally present. Sitting with their loved one, talking with them, just being family. They also believe…
When my cat Merlin passed away, it happened quickly. One day, he was his usual happy self; the next, a seizure made it clear something serious was wrong. Within 24 hours, we had to say goodbye. The grief was immediate and heavy. At that time, I had just started exploring shamanic practices through a course I was taking. One exercise invited me to journey and connect with someone I’d lost. I didn’t…
Most people don’t want to talk about what happens after they die. I get it, it’s uncomfortable. I was lucky; in my family, we didn’t avoid it. My parents planned ahead. Years ago, they made their arrangements and then sat down with my two brothers and me and walked us through everything. I remember thinking, "This is a little strange. Not bad, just… not a conversation we’ve had before. And…
