I started learning a bit of English through some games at kindergarten. I didn't like them - I found my teachers' pronunciation absolutely cringe, and I was a very sober and serious child, so I used to look at my classmates repeating words after the teachers not in a much better way than what you do when you think you're surrounded by a flock of sheep.
Was I snobby and arrogant? MOST PROBABLY YES, but I just hated people - I hated children especially, how noisy and impolite they were.
I hated being a child myself. I just wanted to spend time alone in a corner, sinking into my thoughts without being bothered.
Also, I've always had a very bad auditory memory, so I struggled terribly to remember the words they taught us (like the names of fruit and vegetables - because one of the first things you do as a child learning English is go grocery shopping in London or with your parents on holiday, of course... right? Especially in 1997-1998...).
Plus, unfortunately, I couldn't read yet.
What was my approach to English at primary school given this auspicious beginning? Not the best.
I don't remember much from primary school (6-11 years old). I just had complete chaos in my mind, with some occasional bursts of success when we had to produce more complex texts - because I could finally see a clear correspondence between Italian and English, mistakes included.
Did my teachers tell me absolutely not to use the dictionary? OF COURSE.
Was my book so messy that I had no clue whatsoever which words I was supposed to know? YES.
Did I respect the rules and refrain from getting my hands on a dictionary?
HELL NO.
If I learned anything - and I still remember that my written work was better for it - it was only because I could use a freaking dictionary and see the sentence-building blocks in both languages.
After primary school came what we call middle school in Italy. The book was so much better: a clear dialogue-based structure, grammar explanations, word lists, and tons of exercises. My teacher was nothing short of a saint - we had to copy out the dialogues on a weekly basis (a fantastic exercise), and we had a quick test every Friday.
She was still against dictionaries, but I used them anyway. Her way of pronouncing English was not cringe at all. I had clarity - I swear, when I write English today I still remember the pages from that book.
Still, I had no opportunity to use it on my own, and above all I felt embarrassed about pronouncing English out loud. I could do it quite well, but I was ashamed of letting others hear me. I was still very shy.
Then, at the end of the 2004-2005 school year, one of my current best friends landed in my class. She had come from the Philippines with outstanding American English, and we... well, we could barely interact with her.
She was a bit like the new toy - though what level of maturity can you expect from eleven- and twelve-year-olds? - but somehow I managed to get her more attached to me than to my other classmates, which eventually triggered my desire to learn English better.
I didn't do it on purpose - I just did what I thought was right. Picture an "IT lab", which is a fancy way of describing a classroom with some PCs.
We had to uselessly copy a text on the computer, and they would have her spend a few minutes with each of us, going from one computer station to the next.
I'm very pragmatic, and the same way I try to challenge my students to be more ambitious - well, it was already happening back then.
Since she was a new toy for most children, people were just happy having her nearby as their audience.
Was she bored? Active? Passive? Wasting her time? WE DON’T GIVE AN F.
It was their moment of glory with the trophy.
When it was my turn, I was exclusively thinking: "This girl needs to learn, ASAP."
ASAP like what I talk about here:
So I asked her to read the text out loud while I copied it.
Why? At least she would learn to read and pronounce correctly. I figured typing would be too hard for her. This was in 2005.
Guess who she got closer to after that?
Yep - a perfect example of Stockholm syndrome.
So of course she started spending a lot of time with me. At the same time, most of my classmates were quite annoyed by the fact that I had stolen their trophy, their toy.
I didn’t consider her a toy. That’s all.
Whenever she had trouble making herself understood to my classmates, she would come to me for help, because she had realized that in the meantime my English was a little better than the others’. The more she needed my help, the more motivated I was to improve my English too - especially because her level was pretty good.
Of course we were also in touch outside of school.
Just like what I do now with WhatsApp voice messages, back then we would exchange SMS on our Nokia 3410s. It was normal. We were just chatting with each other the whole time.
Just like I did for French:
This helped me hugely in building my vocabulary - also because I often ended up working as an interpreter for my teachers. The typical Italian teacher back then had barely studied English at all, maybe a little French, but certainly couldn't speak English. I literally remember acting as a sort of simultaneous interpreter during certain classes - music, for example.
It was a very nice period, and it coincided with two things: discovering MSN Messenger and stumbling onto the world of language exchange platforms online. That triggered a kind of virtuous circle. And then, naturally, since you're 11-12 and starting to develop your own musical taste, music entered the picture too.
My music teachers were Jamiroquai, Depeche Mode, and Placebo. I spent those years with my MP3 player on every afternoon after homework, repeating lyrics out loud from the booklet while listening. It was improving my pronunciation without me even realizing it. I would look up translations online - there were plenty of websites for that already - and learn by comparing.
My whole method, really, was always the same: finding the right correspondence between English and Italian, all day, all the time.
Just like I still preach 20 years later:
Basically, my current English is still the one I built by the end of middle school. I stopped making progress in 2008-2009, because high school gave me nothing.
The first two years were a tedious grammar revision. The last three were literature, and I don't give a f*** about literature, honestly - except for Beowulf, which I found genuinely fascinating as a window into the linguistic evolution of English. Nobody else in my class cared, so we spent far too little time on it.
Outside the classroom it was a different story. I was constantly using English through language exchange platforms, YouTube, Facebook when it arrived, and so on. The gap between my level and my classmates' just kept growing every year - and it had nothing to do with school. Funny, in a way. But that's that.
The point is clarity: having clear building blocks in your mind, and practicing because something genuinely interests you - intrinsic motivation.
For me it was staying in touch with her, helping her learn Italian as fast as possible. That's it. And if you need that kind of structure and motivation, you can join my community.
Check it out - it's free to browse
Practice, practice, practice: use vocabulary, use the dictionary, build those mental building blocks.
Someone might say: “But you learned thanks to her.” Not really - she never corrected me, and at some point she switched to Italian quite fast, so we weren’t speaking English long enough for her to be any kind of teacher to me.
I just kept using it every single day: paying attention to what I was writing, staying mindful, learning new vocabulary around things that interested me, and ignoring the rule against dictionaries.
If you’re tired of studying without ever really using the language - the Frequency Circle is where I respond to everything you write, every week. Courses, meetings, and daily practice included. Italian, Dutch, French, or English. $23/month (free trial available). Join here.
Do you want to directly work through WhatsApp with me? Try it two weeks for free
Comments
Nothing yet. Say the first thing.
Sign in to join the conversation.