Storm in a teacup

Whatever you are carrying within will ‘spill out’ when you are shaken!

We are all ‘carriers’ - we carry the memories and traumas of the past within us, often unconsciously. It is only when we are shaken by the trials of life that these become visible and whatever is on the inside of us will spill out. So if we carry anger, or unforgiveness or any unresolved emotion, it may remain hidden whilst we are coasting along. We may have become experts at hiding our true feelings, or perhaps we are unaware that we still carry them? Whatever the reason, the truth of our inner state will often reappear at the most inopportune moments, surprising us with its intensity!

That innocent comment, or sideways glance, may be all it takes to trigger us. We become flustered and defensive and lash out with a disproportionate reaction that sends the other person reeling! Recognising that it was never about them is the first step forward in recovery.

Reclaiming inner calm can only be achieved by facing our own ‘inner demons’. The hardest part of this inner work is recognising what is so often deeply hidden - even to ourself. For how can we work on what we do not even see?

Let’s turn this scenario on its head!!

What if that person or event that triggers you most is actually your greatest gift! Think about it. The people you struggle with, the ones who cause you the most angst - what if they are your finest teachers? What if their purpose is not merely to aggravate and annoy you incessantly? Could you be open to the fact that they may actually be helping you to develop and grow by highlighting the unhealed parts of you? Can you see their interactions as a gift?

‘Are you crazy?’- I hear you cry!!! ‘Why would I even consider that idea?’

As we are developing self awareness we come to see that EVERY person in our life story acts as a mirror 🪞 to us. They reflect both our light and dark sides. So whilst we may feel comfortable and at ease with some people, we may also feel irritated and uncomfortable around others. Every person informs us about who we are - ie ‘Does that thing that annoys me in you exist also in me?’

We’ve all met that person who appears to be a ‘storm carrier’. They are always in the middle of a crisis. Everyone around them is touched by their inner storm. They ‘spill out’ onto everyone in their immediate vicinity. They appear to be at odds with the whole world! The key 🔑 to mastery is to understand where we each begin and end - that is to say, to know where our individual boundaries are, and to be in touch with our own feelings so that we do not become overwhelmed by the feelings of others.

I may be feeling content and peaceful - until along comes Mrs X with her inner storm of chaotic feelings - her pain, suffering or rage - and it touches me deeply. Will I be able to stay grounded in my own feelings? Or will I absorb her feelings, Allowing them to destabilise me?

Staying in touch with our own inner state allows us to be more helpful in supporting those in need around us. The truth is that the only person I can ever really change is ME. I can be influential in someone else’s life, I can be supportive and encouraging, but I can never change the way they view the world. Only God can do that 🙏.

Here’s my challenge for the week ahead. Think about what’s happening in your immediate circle?

Is there disharmony or peace?

Are you rescuing or needing rescue?

What irritates or annoys you?

Where do you feel ‘stuck’ or ‘stagnant’?

Can you use the mirror 🪞 of those around you to inform your own growth without forming a judgement or using polarising words such as ‘good/bad’ ‘right/wrong’?

It is always a challenge to look deeply into our inner motivations and be brave enough to address the learned behaviour that divides us from each other. We want to be loved and accepted as we are - yet we often believe that who we are is not ‘good enough’. So we use the measure of others to compare and compete for the love that we already possess within.

We are all ONE - though we appear separate. God’s design is that we return to the truth of this. That we seek Unity in a world of duality and division. Jesus brought this message when he walked on Earth. May we all be One as He is one with the Father and the Holy Spirit.

Continued Blessings

Carole 💜🙏💜