Our Bodies and Peace

About seven years ago, I was in Indiana with my husband and our two toddlers along with the rest of my family to celebrate my sister’s graduation from college. My mom, my sister’s godmother, and I were in the kitchen of our rental cooking and baking for the upcoming graduation party.

I was hurrying around, wanting to help, while also watching my one and three year old. Into the refrigerator I went for an egg, which I proceeded to drop on the floor.

Ugh, as I wiped it up and went in for another egg.

Which I dropped on the floor.

Even more flustered, I wiped that egg up and grabbed another from the fridge.

Yes…which I dropped.

My sister’s godmother, Gina, looked at me and said, “What are you doing? Slow down.”

Why was I so frenzied? Looking back I can imagine I was tired, my mind was in two (or three) different places at once, and I wanted to help when maybe the best help would have been for me to be out of the kitchen.

I think we can all relate to moments where we rush around “like chickens with our heads cut off”—and, for what?

Some situations certainly require urgent actions and decisions. Many (and probably most) of the situations of our daily lives do not.

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I recently asked a friend who works with families at a parish: “What do you think families need right now?”

He responded, “Comfort and peace.”

While families certainly need a host of different things, I imagine peace is at the top of the list. Peace between spouses and siblings. Peace in the hustle of the day to day. Peace that we are going to get through whatever hardships we face. Peace that we can’t find in this world no matter how hard we try.

I think I should read Searching for and Maintaining Peace by Father Jacques Philippe every year. Its practicality and wisdom always offer something, no matter the season I’m in.

In one of the final sections of the book entitled “Some Advice in the Guise of a Conclusion,” Fr. Jacques Philippe offers this:

If I am still not able to remain at peace when faced with difficult situations, then it is better that I should begin to strive to keep this peace in the easier situations of everyday life: to quietly and without irritability do my daily chores, to commit myself to doing each thing well in the present moment without preoccupying myself with what follows, to speak peacefully and without gentleness to those around me, to avoid excessive hurry in my gestures and in the way I climb the stairs! The first steps on the ladder of sanctity could very well be those of my own apartment! The soul is often reeducated by the body! Small things done with love to please God are extremely beneficial in making us grow. (pg. 82, emphasis mine)

After a whole treatise on the ins and outs of maintaining peace, he goes back to the basics: if all of this is too hard, focus on what is right in front of you, and use your body and speech in a way that fosters peace. “The soul is often reeducated by the body!”

I love this because I need all the help I can get! I do get anxious; my mind does wander; I cannot maintain peace at all times. (All things I can expect since I am a human being.)

But, can I smile and speak gently to my child when my inclination is to snap or raise my voice? Yes, I can practice that.

Can I take a moment to recollect myself and make sure I’ve packed what I need to, my children have shoes on, and the wallet is in the car before I zoom off in a rushed effort to be on time? Yes, I can practice that.

Can I put my hand on my husband’s shoulder and tell him I love him when I can tell he needs it, rather than moving on to chores or the children’s normal needs? Yes, I can practice that.

We have a quote from St. Francis de Sales hanging in our home; it says, “You learn to love by loving” (Introduction to the Devout Life).

Love is something we do. Cultivating peace is something we do.

And as people created in the image of God, body and soul, we do things like love and peace with our whole selves.

In the most practical of ways this week—starting with the moments of today—let’s take seriously the goodness of doing small, practical things with a spirit of peace, gentleness, and charity. We climb the ladder of sanctity one rung at a time.

Consider my book, The Restless Grain. Click here to see more and buy a copy today.