3 Tips to Tolerate Summer Body Grief

I’m not really a summer person.

In a prior time in my life, I would have said that I disliked summer because I was fat; I was always hot, sweaty and uncomfortable. But as I’ve worked to heal my relationship with my body image, I realize that I no longer need to scapegoat my body when I say I don’t like the summer as much as I love the fall. (I’ll take pumpkin spice + cozy sweaters over humidity any day).

Even though I have moved to a place of healing , that doesn’t mean I don’t experience discomfort in the summer season. I’ve also learned that my neurodivergence heightens sensory discomfort, which means sweating and extreme heat can feel unbearable to me.

Heat and sweat are unavoidable in the summer. And so are feelings of body grief and discomfort. But with toxic wellness culture louder than ever, the pressure to shrink ourselves in order to wear that swimsuit, the shame we feel about sweating or about our thigh chafing can feel intolerable.

And it sucks.

While telling you that you can wear and eat whatever the f*ck you want in the body you are in now, and it doesn’t matter if you sweat or chafe— doesn’t doesn’t make the shame or body grief disappear.

Though there is no quick fix to working through these feelings, I want to share a few tips that I use to make this season feel so much more tolerable — especially if you are in a fat body.

Tip #1: Prepare for Your Day In Advance

Check the weather in advance before you leave the house, including the humidity. Make a plan for how you will tolerate the heat. If you know you are going to sweat, prepare to navigate that hurdle.

For me this means either bringing paper towels or a rag, wearing sweat absorbent clothing, or bringing a hat or fan.

For example, when I go to the airport, I always wear my Superfit Hero wear. I know that it will keep me cool and I don’t have to worry about sweat prints.

Another example, when I went speed dating, I purposefully wore my hair up because I knew that it would help to keep my temperature down.

I wore this hat after a pool day because I knew that I would be warm. Keeping the sun off my face helped keep my body temperature partially regulated.

It feels like a simple answer, but it can really help to be creative around heat hurdles. I’ve done things that may seem embarrassing to admit— like putting paper towels under my boobs or under my apron belly. But I’d rather sit in the discomfort of embarrassment for a few moments before hand than sit in the discomfort of chafing later.

Tip #2: Chafing Prevention + Care

If you’ve ever been embarrassed by awkward and uncomfortable chafing, know that this isn’t an exclusively fat person issue. I’ve tried so many of the products out there to prevent chafing, and here are some of my favorite.

• Gold Bond Anti Friction Stick or Spray: This stick was one of the first products I used. Overtime, I found the spray was helpful for hard to reach areas. I love that it has aloe in it – which is extra soothing when your skin feels raw.

• Mega Babe Thigh Rescue: Years later, I discovered Mega Babe’s anti-chafing products. Mega Babe is a female owned business and I have liked more than just their anti-chafing products. I especially like their bust dust for that uncomfortable boob sweat.

• Anti-Monkey Butt (AMB) Anti-Fiction Products: Last year, AMB (formerly Anti-Monkey Butt) sent me some of their products. Not only do they win of the funniest name in the anti-chafe game, but their pink Lady Friction powder has calamine in it. It smells so good but also offers really soothing component to your skin. You can read all about my experience here.

• Thigh Society Anti-Chafe Slip Short Underwear: Thigh Society offers slip shorts from sizes XS– 6XL. I especially like that they offer different fabrics, which are great when you experience sensory discomfort. My favorites are their cooling shorts, they are buttery soft.

• Snag Tights Chub Rub Shorts: Snag offers an unparalleled color selection (30+ options!) and an inclusive size range of 0-32. These shorts are a little more sheer, but they never roll or ride up. Snag has other products that I highly recommend checking out including plus size towels, tights + robes!

If you’ve already chafed, best care is to wash and dry the area (and keep it dry). I find that using an anti-fungal spray after chafing brings relief and a quicker healing time.

Tip #3: BYOC (Bring Your Own Chair)

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve showed up to a summer bbq only to realize… I don’t fit in their outdoor furniture. That’s why I am a strong proponent of BYOC, or bring your own chair. Sure, it can be a little embarrassing to waltz in with my own chair, it is far less distressful than showing up and realizing I can’t sit down. My favorite camping chair is the Guide Gear Club Camping Chair. It’s light weight, easy to open and close + hold up to 500lb capacity. It’s also really comfortable!

If that’s you now, I want you to ask yourself if you have the capacity to sit with the feelings of grief that might arise. If you’re not able to do that right now, that’s totally okay. If you feel you do have capacity, remember to treat those feelings with curiosity and not self-criticism.

Ask yourself what you need at that moment and make those accommodations without judgement: what would it look like if I collaborated with my body instead of against it?

Summer is allowed to feel difficult and uncomfortable, but your body doesn’t have to be the scapegoat for why it is difficult. And if you want some practical ways to explore your body grief with curiosity instead of criticism, be sure to download my free 7 Step Guide a great resource to get started.

If you have any other fat hacks for surviving the summer season, comment below! And if you’re anything like me, here’s some great news: only 60ish days until the fall…

Stay cool, friends!