doing what feels good <3

Dear reader,

I’m writing to you today with a different kind of impulse. This newsletter began with a certain kind of attention. A certain kind of intention, even. And these intentions have changed. While I won’t go into (too much) detail, today I’m understanding new ways in which work and commitment can sustain you, not drain you. I wouldn’t say the intentions behind the newsletter have changed entirely - rather, they have shifted, morphed, gently surrendered to a new awareness in me and a new flow in my life (and creative practice ofc.)

All this to say that I'm writing to you in a place that feels new. And that is… interesting. Neither good nor bad, rather something of note that I am happy to also make you aware of as you read.

As always, if you’re new here, hi (and what I’ve just written may not be of interest to you, let’s just go along with it). Check out my website and Instagram (if you have it!).

& thanks, for being here <3

I have said some things already in my latest voice-note that I may end up repeating. This is an organic process. That’s what makes it alive. I’m also aware that I alluded (via Substack Notes) to several upcoming themes in my “next newsletter” i.e. this very text you are reading and I am (not very) sorry to say that not all of these themes will necessarily feature. The times are changing. Let’s roll with it.

(proud of this pic I took earlier this week, in the nearby community gardens, just after filling up some watering cans for the plants etc.)

Doing what feels good — what does that mean exactly and why is it relevant to my newsletter? To my art practice? And why share this? Well, I think sometimes, for a multitude of reasons, art and art-making can be hampered by this myth of the suffering artist. One must suffer to create good art…

etc. etc. etc.

And I think in some of us it is so hardwired that even when you’re aware of it, it still persists. For me, at least, it made itself manifest in the sense that I was so used to “using art to heal” (which is a good thing, or can be! - art is a powerful tool ofc.) that one day I became somewhat perplexed when I simply made something that felt good from start to end. No transmuting, no transforming, no alchemy. Oh, how dull!

So much of my Art, including this newsletter, was about facilitating this sort of change in experience. And what happens when I no longer require this change in experience? Well, I'm not sure; but, I did get some insight into the kinds of things I might want to expand upon when I created what I now refer to (affectionately) as “mermaid medicine” (a long-form version of the audio sketch in my most recent voice-note).

Of course there are a lot of things I’ve already made, or made part of (kind of like raw material) that I feel I want to bring to full fruition, but the landscape and terrain around this work and the making feels different. Less urgent. More playful.

~ ~ ~

On the topic of play (!) I had a wonderful experience that spontaneously arose after making the extended version of my ephemeral loop (1) / “mermaid medicine” instalment.1 I had just finished creating it and was listening to it myself when a poem by Sophie Strand came upon my feed.2 I decided, wouldn’t it be interesting to record myself reading this poem over the wordless vocals I had just recorded? So I did. I cannot share the result here, as even though I am currently a small creator, I am wary of copyright and fair use, seeing as Sophie Strand is a contemporary poet; but, I am planning on reading it aloud live at an informal poetry open mic alongside my recording, where the rules are a bit different!3

If you’d like to listen to an example of poetry being read over a simple, repetitive melody, check out this old work of mine.

As I mentioned in my voice-note, I’m cancelling my two summer workshops. Well, I never set up a page for them; but, the idea did exist in some level of public-ness, so yes, the two events are no more. Instead, I’m going to make something and put it up for sale in my Big Cartel store. It will recreate the spirit of the workshop and you will be able to do it in your own time & space! Neat!

Around the same time, I’ll also be uploading the six poems live reading. Poetry galore <3 !!!!!!!!

I’ve decided to intentionally rest and celebrate and enjoy my life as much as possible in the month of August, as it is my birthday month! I love having a birthday month because it means I can pack it full to the brim with lovely things while resting as well. It means I’m not hampered by the need to pick a date to “celebrate” that works for different people being away at different times, and if I feel like resting and doing nothing on my actual birthday, it won’t matter because I’ve already filled the month with lovely social interaction. Less pressure = more fun. Feels good!

I’m not sure I’ll be sending along a newsletter in August. Looks unlikely.

So… until next time!!! Whenever that may be.

Stay hydrated!

Angelica xXxXXXxXXXXXxxxx