PSA Parent Company Acquires Beckett Media as Elaborate Smokescreen to Conceal Purchase of "Timmy’s Totally Rad Bike Spoke Klackers, Inc."

NEWPORT BEACH, CA – In a seismic shift that has rocked the sports collectibles industry, Collectors Universe, parent company of grading giant PSA, announced today the acquisition of rival Beckett Media. However, financial insiders and people who spend too much time on hobby message boards have confirmed this massive consolidation of power was merely a "strategic acoustic distraction" designed to…