One Step at a Time

Billy Kaderli

114°F and the paperwork keeps coming.

Akaisha was my personal secretary for decades. We always shared the duties and used to say it takes two of us to live one life. That pretty much sums it up. We worked well together. Now sorting through everything on my own is a real challenge.

It’s a maze. Each time I think I’m finished, something else pops up. Yesterday I received notice that Social Security wants her July deposit returned. Okay… how? I’m not sitting on hold with Social Security for hours. Been there, done that. Hopefully the estate specialist at Fidelity who has been helping me can figure it out, since her account is already closed. Returning the money isn’t the problem—the question is how to do it cleanly.

I’m also entitled to the $255 Social Security death benefit. This is not automatic—you have to apply for it. I spent an hour on the phone waiting and speaking with a representative, only to be told I need a scheduled appointment. The earliest available phone appointment is late September. I have no idea if I’ll even be in the States then. The timing is frustrating. For $255… is it even worth it?

Every time I feel like I’m gaining ground, another issue shows up. Still, I keep going. I know this is what Akaisha wanted, and I’m determined to see it through for her.

A reader recently wrote: “I have so often seen that just when we are hurting the most, are the most overwhelmed, are vulnerable and wish to curl up and process what has happened, we are instead called to engage in paperwork.”

That’s exactly how it feels. My natural instinct is to push through and get things done, but some of these hurdles are higher than expected. I’m still determined to take care of business. At the same time, every piece of mail that arrives with Akaisha’s name on it stops me for a moment. I’m learning to expect the unexpected.

I’m an optimist by nature. I wake up most mornings feeling reasonably good, but as the day wears on I get worn down. It could be the physical and emotional work of moving her belongings, the constant stream of paperwork, the desert heat—or all of it combined. By 7:00 p.m. I’m usually done. Then I find myself wide awake at 4:00 a.m.

The process continues. One step at a time.

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About the Authors

Billy and Akaisha Kaderli are recognized retirement experts and internationally published authors on topics of finance, medical tourism and world travel. With the wealth of information they share on their award winning website RetireEarlyLifestyle.com, they have been helping people achieve their own retirement dreams since 1991. They wrote the popular books, The Adventurer’s Guide to Early Retirement and Your Retirement Dream IS Possible available on their website bookstore or on Amazon.com.