The Powers and Pitfalls of Personality

Have you ever taken a personality quiz to figure out which Harry Potter house you would be in? Or what your spirit animal is?

Amidst the wild waves of life, tests like this can be tempting—a cosmic ring buoy to pull us into the safe harbor of knowing This, this is who I am.

Enter the personality quiz a friend and I came up with once—Which Element Are You?

We decided he would be salt. Full of flavor. Of the earth. Acting as a cheerleader for others. Crucial for making life good.

Someone else we knew was definitely helium—all swirling air and often delightfully ridiculous.

Copper would be someone warm, bright, and grounded, whereas someone who kills the energy slowly but surely must be lead.

We agreed I am mercury—that quick, silvery element that has a hard time staying still.

Mercury can also read temperatures, which tracks, as I am constantly cued into how hot or cold situations are running. It’s one of my superpowers.

And it’s exhausting.

Which reminds me of something my therapist once observed—our superpowers can also be our potential downfalls.

If you are gold—shining, invaluable, soft—people will adore you, but they also might use you, shape you into things you’d rather not be.

If you are carbon, you are the foundation of life, the ultimate shape shifter. Yes, you can meet whatever the demands of the situation are, but the pressure!

My quick, changeable energy often serves me well. Like Clark Kent, I can transform on the fly from professor to yoga teacher to writer to pastor. Now I’m in spandex! Now I’m in heels!

And my ability to take the temperature of a room can help me to know what’s the best energy to bring into a situation, and yet all of this can leave me feeling like Superman in the presence of Kryptonite.

It reminds me of something my mom often says about Alfred, my Chiweenie.

Whenever he’s interested in something, his elephantine ears rise like antennae, and my mom will ask, “Don’t his ears get tired?”

Don’t we all get tired sometimes? Of being who we are? Of leaning into our superpowers?

Perhaps, that’s why elements bond. Two hydrogen join forces with one oxygen to make water, something more stable and yet also more able to go with the flow.

Which is why it is so important to bond with those who bring out our best qualities—and they might be wildly different than ourselves.

Which brings its own challenges. Some combinations bring big reactions.

Like the time our high school valedictorian put wet paper towels over a sink in our chemistry classroom. Turning the Bunsen burner on, he aimed the unlit gas down into the deep well and lit a match. The explosion burnt off his eyebrows.

There is power—in our ways of being.

In the potential combinations we might make.

So we need to treat the elements of our personalities with a healthy respect. And as I am learning more and more, we need to practice working with rather than fighting against.

I once read, “I am as God created me.” I repeat it now on days when I feel too Betsy.

But as the wise prophet Popeye oft proclaimed, I yam what I yam, just as you are as you are, each with our own powers and pitfalls.

And in the midst of all this, we can bond.

And see what’s possible.

Hey. Take care of you.

And your eyebrows.