"We're Looking for People Who Do Huge Numbers on Social Media"

And yet I persist:

directed & edited by Adam Newacheck

I put out another half hour special on YouTube! Please watch and comment, or get yourself a hat trick by subscribing! I put this on YouTube over three months ago but I often feel immobilized by the Internet, so I never pressed send on this. You should see my email! I just checked; there are 587 drafts.

As a classically trained stand-up comedian, I struggled with calling this one ^ a special. “Special” feels like a misnomer. My discomfort stems from it being self-proclaimed, when previously a special was bestowed upon me by Comedy Central, Showtime, Netflix or HBO Max. For twelve or so years those four places liked my stand-up then paid me to perform it on film for posterity. So who am I to call me special?! After nineteen years in comedy surely I’m not qualified to give myself that type of distinction, it has to come from the top! Alright it sounds like I’m a gatekeeper simp.

I guess that’s why I didn’t make a big splash about this one? The Landlord Special was my first longform YouTube release last summer and I just acted like it was a real special. Admittedly I titled it that way to be cheeky, but it worked! I promoted on podcasts and it got great press (thank you New York Times) even without the streamers and networks! My record label Blonde Medicine released the audio and their in-house PR team Shark Party was instrumental in spreading the word.

So why can’t I do that again, garshdarnit? I think it’s because this one was only meant to be a proof of concept to networks and streamers (the old way). Basically that knowing me as an artist, they trusted it would become a great special (in-progress while touring) and that they may want to produce it so I don’t have to pay for it myself and hope I recoup my costs (the new way)!

I filmed this at Netflix Is A Joke Fest in May 2024 at Hollywood Forever Cemetery. My managers sent it to the big guys (Hulu, HBO, Netflix, Amazon) and the feedback was that they loved the material but ultimately passed due to my inadequate online following. Netflix was less of a “no” and more of a “not right now,” which made sense considering they just released If You Didn’t Want Me Then in October 2023 for a two-year license. It was Amazon’s feedback that really stuck with me in June of 2024:

So I canceled my Amazon Prime membership! Okay fine I did that for other reasons (like Jeff Bezos being a greedy, little byitch and not raising the wages of his Amazon workers). No one should be pissing in buckets at work unless it’s me and I’ve been paid a large sum of money by Bert Kreischer’s Fully Loaded Cruise. As it stands I love not receiving packages from Amazon. On occasion a friend will repurpose an Amazon box (good on ya) to send me a treat, but when it arrives my heart drops as if I’ve forgotten my commitment to [imperceptibly] stick it to Jeff’s money-grubbing ass. I cherish a care package but screw that shell it came in!! I don’t want my neighbors seeing me with the mark of the devil (Amazon’s black and blue threaded packing tape)! The only thing I miss is The Boys.

Back to the story of getting rejected! My feelings were hurt and my confidence at hell level. I questioned whether it was actually my low monetary value as a social media presence OR if I just wasn’t good enough at stand-up. So yeaaaah I took it way too hard like the sensitive artist I am. I felt like a failure as a stand-up because I couldn’t garner a massive online following. I also told myself I don’t want everyone to like me, just the right people. Like you. So I kept touring, wrote more jokes, played around onstage and found new tags. The landlord story felt finished (catharsis complete) so I paid a small team of brilliant friends (and a lover) to help me capture it while on tour at Denver Comedy Works. I was happy to share that fun performance with my friends and fans who hadn’t eaten since If You Didn’t Want Me Then.

That left me with the above material (the subject of this newsletter) and a blank slate. Naturally the material changed over the course of touring, but last Fall I was getting the sense that perhaps I’d overworked the material, it was becoming rote. I realized I was waiting (preserving material) for a special that wasn’t coming. I needed to move on. So I hired a kind filmmaker named Michael Dennis to film me (last minute, only one camera) at The Wilbur Theatre in Boston. It was an incredibly lovely night and a milestone. I felt connected with the audience and gave them a finely prepared hour, but it’s possible that my set was too well done. In the beef kind of way!

So I went back to watch this 2024 version and it has an in-the-moment energy that I really loved! It is my first “take” on those experiences, an imperfect, happy time capsule. In conclusion this one might be rare but it’s so fun to watch, probably because I’m still mooing (another beef reference)! Maybe I’ll release the well-done Boston version at some point? At least the first half hour that I’ve outgrown. It’s the wild, wild West on the Internet these days.

I’ll be touring my new material until they stop letting me. The themes are: procreation, plastic surgery, step-moms, alcoholism, T.D.S., childhood trauma affecting life partner choices… you know, my typical lighthearted stuff. I’m coming to Denver, Rochester, Indianapolis, Honolulu, Philadelphia, Brooklyn, Pittsburgh… the list goes on.

Thanks for your support! I enjoy your comments because they’re insightful. Is there anything I left out or you want to hear more about? I feel relieved to finally press send. I’m curious how you feel.

Love,
Beth