notes for a passing year and a new one too

Hello in there.

It’s 2026. But you know that. The number is so big it’s kind of meaningless to me. But I feel like I’ve experienced a shift. Maybe it’s my meditation practice. Maybe it’s perimenopause. Maybe it’s Maybelline! It could also be related to something that I think my nephew was trying to communicate to me over Christmas:

My nephew is 12 and he mentioned he didn’t feel the same excitement this year. I mean, it makes sense: he’s grown out of the mystery. If he’s like me he’ll get a few things he wanted for gifts, and some things he doesn’t like, but he knows better than to express it. He’s got some time before he’s out hanging with friends of his own. He’s the youngest in the adults’ dart game, and the oldest of the kids watching a movie.

“Yeah, bud. You know how the magic works now. It’s different.” I shrugged. “Sorry. You’re kinda like the rest of us now.”

I was about the same age when Christmas lost its sparkle. For me, it became an uncomfortable conversation about where I was going to be over the holidays. My situation is different than my nephew’s, but we all end up in kinda the same place.

And then I think of Grandma Laila who saw decades of Christmases. Her perspective must have been in some part that Christmas was a checklist. If she followed it, events would flow smoothly and tradition was observed. The other part of her perspective – the part that made it special – was precious time with family. She’d hug you one moment and the next she’d whisper hooju1 over your dice just before you rolled. It was important to her to gather. It was important to her to laugh.

I’m no humbug about Christmas, nor do I think anyone would be pressed to call me an enthusiast. But now I know that it’s my job to make the magic happen for my kid. I won’t be baking gingerbread houses from scratch forever, but I’m definitely in my era.

I’ve spent time with various books, audiobooks and podcasts in the last two months of 2025 and the beginning of 2026:

I really enjoyed listening to the podcast Fela Kuti: Fear No Man by Jad Abumrad. I listened to an audiobook of The Scarlet Letter. I liked it? I’m not sure. Puritans are intense. I read Fifteen Dogs by André Alexis. Drummer Jeff told me that I’m the only person he knows who didn’t cry at the end. I also read a memoir, I’ll Tell You When I’m Home, by Hala Alyan. I liked it. I’m sure.

The first few days of January have had me compiling my creative intentions into lists: from reading more books, to writing another album, to finishing the one we recorded last April, to making macrame plant hangers, to recreating an eyeglasses look that my Grandpa Alec rocked in the 80s... I’m mapping the lists out over the landscape of my year so they might be accomplished! If I’m lucky maybe it’ll be by Spring Equinox. That’s lofty. Haha!

My friends, I hope your walk though the holidays left you feeling more connected than not. I hope you took a little time for yourself. I hope you enjoyed Christmas, Soltice, Hanukkah, New Year’s Eve or whatever you did in your time between December 23rd and January 2nd.

Let’s do a new year.