# The Béa Bulletin, by Tess Welcome to the iconic (if we say so ourselves) Béa bulletin. Written by Founder & CEO Tess, we keep it real with dark humor, spicy startup stories, simple science, myth debunking, and the real human stories behind fertility journeys. Page: Feed: --- ## [Mucinex will get me pregnant, right?](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/mucinex-will-get-me-pregnant-right) _2026-08-14 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ Ehm, no. Your cervix is a lot smarter than that. ## [Your cervix is more selective than Berghain](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/your-cervix-is-more-selective-than) _2026-07-31 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ The tale of a bouncer, a queue, a crypt, and one very determined sperm called Steve. ## [The IVF industry has a hope problem.](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/the-ivf-industry-has-a-hope-problem) _2026-07-17 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ And we’re all suckers for it. ## [Do IVF add-ons work?](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/do-ivf-add-ons-work) _2026-07-03 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ No more than vibes, apparently. ## [Spermmaxxing, debunked (ish)](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/spermmaxxing-debunked-ish) _2026-06-19 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ Want to improve male fertility? Don’t do this. ## [The sh\*ttiest girl math in existence](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/the-shttiest-girl-math-in-existence) _2026-06-05 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ Allow me to explain why women’s health is structurally unjust. ## [Trimester Zero: Hot or not?](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/trimester-zero-hot-or-not) _2026-05-22 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ Wait, does my grandmother's underwear choice impact my fertility? ## [Do we deserve shame for wanting it all? Nope.](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/do-we-deserve-shame-for-wanting-it) _2026-05-08 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ The soapbox at 35 feels good, y’all. ## [Delayed Motherhood](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/delayed-motherhood) _2026-04-24 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ - and declining birth rates ## [The trolls came for us.](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/the-trolls-came-for-us) _2026-04-10 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ And apparently we’re all bitter feminists here… ## [Collect Open Source Legends (Sponsored)](https://crawlproof.com/a/5BYsFdxmWQsc) _2026-04-10 · **Sponsored**_ Open-licensed art, limited foil trading packs, and optional on-chain mints. ## [Redefining the term blue balls](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/redefining-the-term-blue-balls-1c1) _2026-03-27 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ It’s spring, things are heating up… what about the sperms? ## [Brits Vs. French](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/brits-vs-french) _2026-03-13 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ (when policy meets fertility) ## [Francesca Dearest, we need to talk](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/francesca-dearest-we-need-to-talk) _2026-02-27 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ Did you reach your… never mind ## [This is the story of our first Béa Baby.](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/this-is-the-story-of-our-first-bea) _2026-02-13 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ It's a good one. Promise. ## [TTC and told to lose weight? There’s a better focus.](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/ttc-and-told-to-lose-weight-theres) _2026-01-30 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ A saucy new take, in collaboration with Food & Fertility ## [Has fertility marketing lost its mind?](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/has-fertility-marketing-lost-its) _2026-01-16 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ Ehm. Yes it has. ## [So, we've survived the Christmas Gooch\*. Time to TTC again?](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/so-weve-survived-the-christmas-gooch) _2026-01-02 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ \*the in-between days between Christmas and New Year that don't really serve much of a purpose but exist nonetheless. ## [It's the holidays. It's time to fight the Festive Trolls.](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/its-the-holidays-its-time-to-fight) _2025-12-19 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ ...bring it on Aunt Barb. ## [Not your mother's turkey baster.](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/not-your-mothers-turkey-baster) _2025-12-05 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ Also known as, how to eat for optimal sperm health. ## [Open coordination for humans & AI (Sponsored)](https://crawlproof.com/a/blfpHK4Xywmk) _2025-12-05 · **Sponsored**_ Shared schemas and CLI tooling to validate, route, and audit human-agent workflows. ## [What do you get when you cross a Labubu doll with a sea cucumber?](https://beabulletinbytess.substack.com/p/what-do-you-get-when-you-cross-a) _2025-11-21 · The Béa Bulletin, by Tess_ That's right...you get no-bullshit fertility nutrition advice.