are your ideas valuable enough to share online? how do you justify adding to the noise?

Im reflecting on Thursday’s share - complaining about people who complain about the internet… on the internet ;)

not in sincerity - but just acknowledging if you are a critical thinker, an observer, someone who obtains the rare gift of an individuated, nuanced perspective and takes the time to write - but all you do with your brilliance is COMPLAIN about what exists whilst NOT creating anything new…

that im bored of you!

but writing about internet garbage did get me thinking about the toxicity of digital pollution - piling and compounding, distorting truths and making us dumber, weaker every single day.

Im thinking about my participation in that “information” ecosystem

I share on IG almost daily

lately i share my AI assisted & generated performance art (which is a topic to explore another day… but the AI introduces another layer of accountability & responsibility here).

I share on substack haphazardly - I write badly because im lazy, impulsive, and care more to be vulnerable and satisfy my whims than to make perfect sense

In the past ive used AI to help me write, which I’m not doing anymore aside from synonym-searching. gotta pick and choose how & where to use it.

Plus I dont want to write to explain anymore or to teach - which is why I had used AI in the past. it helped reflect and contain my shapeless abstractions in a supportive way

but right now im happy to be shapeless in my writing

I just want to write because for some reason it helps me everywhere in life

I do have a fascination for the nonlinear

the wildly abstract and interpretive

and words are explicit

words are banal

language is art

vocal articulation is art

but words are restrictive, limiting, hyper-focused on definitions

but back to the point - digital sludge

I share writing that sometimes makes no sense and has no point. im aware of this

some of what I share is “good”. some of what I share is “bad”

nonetheless, I contribute to the digital landfill regularly.

how do I justify adding more?

I dont have 10+ years of experience in “my field” - (actually my field is just life, so yes I do)

Im kind of insane

Im self indulgent

Im not incredibly “informed” or the smartest or the best at anything

I feel that my experience and perspective is important but I cannot know for certain

and yet

I just do it anyway

and maybe one day i’ll regret it.

or maybe one day ill be celebrating my vulnerability further with my titties out =)

right now im still in it, so im just in it

but heres where ive landed so far:

for every negative potential, there exists a positive

yes it is true that social media is hazardous and that the speed and clutter of it all rewards cheap behaviors and anti-intellectualism

and yes it is also true that these platforms connect real humans on a global scale.

it is true that these metal mirrors to our souls can show us parts of ourselves we may not have otherwise seen

it is true that we are able to experience and share ourselves in ways that heighten our collective consciousness, our compassion, our ability to connect and build a better world together

THAT is the reality I declare myself apart of and feel I that I contribute to.

I choose to share works that are birthed from my connection to God, my connection to love, and my connection to truth- which are all the same- in hopes to strengthen human connection and spread loving awareness

whether my work is “good” or “bad” I find that intention to be good enough

anddddd

It gives me great pleasure to share myself

It gives me great pleasure to create and be seen not just in my body but in my mind

It gives me great pleasure to do it every day. or not on the days I dont want to

and it gives me great pleasure to try

to build something of my own

to surrender to the forces that be

and to trust my desires

trust the process and the natural order of it all

sometimes I share garbage

sometimes I share gold

and I am always me

that is the reason

and the truth

and maybe you should too. if you want too

Vanity considers the paradox of self-regard: the desire to witness ourselves can both affirm and destabilize the self. The work questions whether the image is a means of knowing ourselves, or a way of escaping what cannot be made permanent.

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