Imagine, if you will, that you read your Bible and truly, honestly believed that the Bible taught that white people got to lead and teach, but those of other races couldn’t.
How would you feel?
Or imagine you lived two hundred years ago during American chattel slavery, and you truly believed that the Bible taught that slavery was okay.
How would you feel?
And let’s acknowledge and remember today, Juneteenth, that so many churches did indeed argue this, to their immense shame and judgment.
If you’re anything like me (and I assume that you are because you’re reading this!), you’d be devastated. It would cause a huge crisis of faith. You want to believe in Jesus, you want to follow Him, but how can you if He arbitrarily chooses some to have power over others?
How, exactly, is a God that would make some people inferior to others (even if people claim “it’s equal but different roles!”) good?
And, if I’m honest, despondent is the right word. Since I started speaking out about the SBC decision to restrict women and stop them from preaching or pastoring, I’ve been inundated by literally thousands of comments from mostly men defending the decision and calling me rebellious for challenging it.
Here’s one, from a pastor:
Here’s another from someone who trained at a Baptist seminary:
Now, not all commenters are like this. Some men just leave long arguments for why complementarianism is the correct viewpoint. They say, essentially, “the Bible says this, and who are you to question the Bible?”
I wish it weren’t this way, but I think this is what Scripture says.
Not a single one has said, “Yeah, I know this sounds awful, and it really is unfair, and I don’t know why God would do this, but I do believe God did this.”
And that, my friends, is what hurts more than anything else. That’s what keeps me up at night.
It’s not the rude ones, because you will always have rude ones. It’s the ones who gleefully share all the Scripture passages, and show absolutely no remorse about the outcome of this for women. Who don’t care that this puts women into inferior, insubordinate positions; who don’t care that this makes women more vulnerable.
They’ll just claim it doesn’t. That men are called to love their wives as Christ loved the church, and that God will hold men responsible for how women are treated, so all will be well.
700 cases of sexual abuse in the SBC show what a lie that is.
Quite simply, if I believed that God created me to have power over others, I would be absolutely crushed. Because I know that this is not just.
We all know it’s not fair! We all played as kids and had an innate sense of justice. We all wanted the rules followed. We hated when someone got special treatment. We knew the ideal was to share. We learned all of this in kindergarten.
And then somehow it seems that those in the SBC have forgotten it. They’ve convinced themselves that unjust isn’t unjust. That what is blatantly sexist can’t be called sexist if God wills it—even if the exact same thing would be called sexist in any other setting.
So here’s my question: how can someone who truly loves Jesus, and who wants to spread that love to the world, and who wants to be Jesus’ hands and feet, not be devastated to learn that God shows favouritism and gives power to some and not to others?
How could they not be upset that they were leaving women vulnerable?
I have had friends in my life who truly believed the Bible taught complementarianism, and they were upset about it. One is a pastor, and he always said he wished it wasn’t that way, but he can’t explain away certain verses (I wish he would read Philip Payne or Marg Mowczko!). I respect that. I don’t agree with him, but I respect that.
But those who don’t show any reticence? To me, that speaks volumes about what they think the kingdom of God is like.
I’ve spent the last year researching women who support complementarianism for my next book Fawn: How a Trauma Response Became Biblical Womanhood, and there are complex reasons that women support their own subjugation. The story is convoluted and difficult.
But when men support it, what they are supporting is the ability to have power over women. And if they are not saddened by that, that speaks volumes.
Romans 1 and 2 tell us that people can learn and know much about God just from looking at the natural world, and living in this world. And learning about justice is ingrained in us. As I said, we learn it as kids.
The fact that so many so eagerly discard what human beings can easily know, in the very fibre of their being, speaks about their hearts.
Someone you know needs to read this post! Share it so they can make sense of the craziness too!
Let me switch gears for a second and show you something else.
Some of you may not understand the significance of this, but let me explain.
Al Mohler is the head of the flagship SBC seminary, and the one who championed the motion that passed last week at the SBC convention that restricted women’s ability to preach or pastor. He has said that women can’t be on church podcasts. He wants to restrict women’s voices.
But Al Mohler is also pretty mainstream in evangelicalism. That’s important to remember, as we turn to Doug Wilson.
Doug Wilson, who is not a trained pastor, has started a denomination in Moscow, Idaho, that the American Secretary of Defence attends. He has written a book claiming chattel slavery wasn’t that bad. He wants the 19th Amendment, that gives women the vote, repealed. He has defended pedophiles in court, and has arranged the marriage of one pedophile to someone in his community to help him deal with his urges (the man was later sent to prison). He advocates for extreme corporal punishment. His wife has said there is no such thing as marital rape. He has said that sex can’t be an egalitarian pleasure party, but must be a man conquering a woman.
In other words, this man is dangerous and looks nothing whatsoever like Jesus. Not even an iota.
For years abuse advocates have been trying to raise the alarm on Wilson (Kristin Du Mez did in Jesus and John Wayne, for instance) but we’ve been told he’s just too fringe. He doesn’t speak for evangelicalism. Don’t worry about him.
And now here’s Al Mohler, fresh from his victory at the SBC convention, teaming up with Wilson.
To Al Mohler, defending slavery and repealing a woman’s right to vote aren’t deal breakers, but a woman teaching about Jesus is.
Okay, here’s where everything starts to make sense, and here’s where I want to land:
Those are two diametrically opposed motivations.
Both use the same Bible. Both use the same words. And both speak past each other.
You can have both types of people in almost every denomination and every church. You can have both types in the SBC, and both types in the ACNA, and both types in the PCA.
Jesus warned us this would happen. Jesus warned us against those who want power and authority over others (Matthew 20:25-28), and said that the point of life is to serve others.
Why would Mohler team up with Wilson? Why would all of these hundreds (if not thousands by now) of commenters on my Facebook feed defend complementariansim without showing any personal remorse?
Because to them Christianity isn’t about love; it’s about getting to have power over others.
Honestly, I can’t see any other explanation for what has happened lately.
I truly believe that the old things that divided denominations, like age of baptism, or Calvinist/arminian, or cessation of gifts vs. charismatic theologies, just aren’t going to matter in the same way as we come to terms with the fact that some in our midst are only here because they can use the Bible to feel superior to others.
And you can’t have fellowship with that. You just can’t.
And so those of us who just want to love the world and share Christ’s love with people, and see that world transformed, are going to have to go our separate ways.
The absolute relentlessness of the attacks has been something I haven’t experienced to the same degree before. But I’m also grateful for the clarity.
And when you see this through the power lens, it all makes sense.
And it sends us back to Philippians 2, where Paul tells us to have the same mind of Christ, who gave up everything for love.
Someone who did that would never be gleeful about getting to have power over others and making them vulnerable.
My husband’s Keith’s series on the Danvers Statement (from the Council for Biblical Manhood and Womanhood)
My Amazon recommendations for books making the Scriptural case for egalitarianism
Our book The Marriage You Want, which shows what marriages marked by equality rather than hierarchy work (and has stats for why they work better!). One of the big things I get asked about is premarital counseling—and The Marriage You Want has a study guide with premarital questions!
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